


Adventures with the Pretty Setter Squad

by spfcs



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Asahi has had enough, Chatlogs, Chatting & Messaging, Cussing, Drugs, Flirting, Implied Sexual Content, Jealous Iwaizumi Hajime, Lots of it, M/M, Marijuana, No Volleyball, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pranks and Practical Jokes, TW//mention of marijuana/edibles in chapter 18, TW//mention of marijuana/edibles in chapter 19, bokuakakuroken is SO obvious now, bokuakakuroken is more obvious in later chapters, everyone agrees bokuto has a fat ass, everyone also likes hinatas ass apparently?, implied bokuakakuroken if you squint, i’m projecting my friendships onto these characters lmao, kageyama is also tired, kenma in a cat cosplay, let’s all go to therapy together, slightly nsfw, stan twitter videos are referenced a BUNCH, twink oikawa
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-13
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:42:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 26
Words: 17,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26993845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spfcs/pseuds/spfcs
Summary: A couple times the pretty setters have gotten themselves dragged into drama
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou/Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou, Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou, Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi
Comments: 150
Kudos: 244





	1. Lyric prank part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pt. 1 of Pretty Setters doing a lyric prank

* * *

Oikawa added Iwaizumi, Akaashi, Sugawara, and Kenma to Pretty Setters 💅🏽

Akaashi: what’s this

Oikawa: a pretty setter groupchat  ✌ ( ◕ ‿-)

Sugawara: Iwaizumi isn’t even a setter.....

Oikawa: Iwa-chan is still pretty ( ง •̀_•́) ง

Kenma: STFU UR POPUPS ARE BLOCKING MY GAME

Iwaizumi: why am i here 

Oikawa: because i want you here ( っ⌒ ‿ ⌒ ) っ

Akaashi: so then where’s kageyama 

Sugawara: oop 😬 .....

Sugawara: the girls are fighting... 😹

Oikawa: i said PRETTY setters 

Iwaizumi: why’re you here then 🤔🚶🏽

Oikawa: Iwa-channnn ( ╥﹏╥ )

Sugawara added Kageyama 

Kageyama: Hi

Sugawara: hello 😁

Oikawa: no ❤️

Oikawa removed Kageyama 

Oikawa: Okay guys so-

Oikawa: wait 

Oikawa removed Iwaizumi

Akaashi: okay so what’s the point of this

Sugawara: LMAO why’d you remove him now 🤔

Oikawa: because we’re gonna do a lyric prank 😸

Kenma: no 

Kenma left the group 

Oikawa added Kenma 

Kenma: but u did this for what  😒

Oikawa: why not

Kenma: why

Oikawa: why not 

Kenma: why tho 🚶🏽

Akaashi: girl anyway....can you tell us why you made this 

Oikawa added Kageyama 

Oikawa:  🙂

Sugawara: is this his way of being nice-

Oikawa: we, the pretty setters and tobio-chan, are gonna be doin a lyric prank  😼

Kageyama: “and tobio-chan”  🤔

Oikawa: yeah 😹💅🏽

Oikawa: anyway 😹

Sugawara: what song are we using

Kenma: can i leave 

Akaashi: if i’m doing it you have to

Kenma: ......fine

Oikawa: Thick by DJ chose 😏😏

Oikawa: wanna make our boyfriends mad 💅🏽

Sugawara: okay 😼

Akaashi: got it

Kenma: yup.

Kageyama: i mean...okay? 

Kenma: he’s confused isn’t he 😐

Sugawara: just follow along 

Kageyama: okay 


	2. Lyric prank part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pretty setters do a lyric prank pt. 2
> 
> Song: Thick by Dj Chose
> 
> you don’t have to listen but if you’d like to there ya go lmao^

Oikawa added Iwaizumi, Kenma, Akaashi, Sugawara, Hinata, Bokuto, Kuroo, Daichi, Ennoshita, Nishinoya, Tanaka, Asahi, and Kageyama

Bokuto: HEY HEY HEY!

Bokuto: Akaashi 🥺

Kuroo: Bokubro 😳

Bokuto: Kurbro 😳

Kenma: y’all are fuckin disgusting  😸

Kuroo: kitten 🥺❤️

Kenma: ..

Kenma: girl anyway 

Nishinoya: HEY GUYS

Tanaka: i sense drama  😏

Ennoshita: drama?  😳🕶🤏🏽

Hinata: hi guysss 😁

Daichi: Whats this for?

Oikawa: **wassup Suga** ** 🥵 **

Sugawara: **wassup Oikawa** ** ❤️ **

Kenma: **wassup akaashi** ** 😼 **

Akaashi: **damn i want all 3** ** 😳 **

Bokuto: but what about me 🥺

Daichi: Whats with the heart 🤔

Kageyama: **ooo hinata**

Hinata: yes 🥺

Hinata: do you wanna play volleyball 🥺

Kageyama: **hinata.....i get hard when he walk past me** ** 🚶🏽 **

Asahi: is this who we are? is this what we represent? tellin somebody to kiss it, lick it, suck it, stick it 🙄

Kageyama: **cuz he thick**

Oikawa: **t-t-t-t-t-thick t-t-t-t-t-thick t-t-t-t-t-thick**

Kuroo: am i crazy or this mf jus stuttered over text 🤔

Kenma: **he make me stutter** ** 😏 **

Hinata: i- kenma  😳

Kuroo: i’ve had enough of dat....i’m tired of it

Nishinoya: Ooop 🤭

Tanaka: told y’all somethin was finna start...i’m never wrong 

Ennoshita: you was wrong asf on those homework answers 😒

Oikawa: **and his friends** ** 🤭 **

Sugawara: **they t-t-t-t-thick t-t-t-t-t-thick t-t-t-t-t-thick**

Akaashi: **i want all of em** ** 🥵🥵 **

Bokuto: but akaashi 🥺

Bokuto: you said you only wanted me 🥺🥺

Iwaizumi: jesus christ i leave for two seconds

Asahi: you called? 

Iwaizumi: this is shittykawas fault isn’t it

Oikawa: IWA-CHAN ( ง ’̀-‘́) ง

Ennoshita: oh i see 

Ennoshita: **running round the trap right now wit a hunnid bands on me i be lookin like brick**

Tanaka: oh he got money  🤑🤑🤑

Daichi: The trap? What trap? 

Kageyama: **ring around the rosie-**

Hinata: pocket full of posies 🥰

Kageyama: **i been ridin wit a 40, if you play you gon feel that stick**

Hinata: that’s not how the song goes bakayama 😠

Bokuto: maybe he has his own version 

Nishinoya: feel what stick 😏😏

Tanaka: nO- doNt MaKe it GaY

Nishinoya: i’m-

Tanaka: just no- YOU LOOKED AT ME

Akaashi: **pull up to the red light, shawty walk by, lookin good shawty lookin like a lick** ** 👅 **

Bokuto: akaashi you have a car?  😧

Oikawa: **ass in the back like a cake with the ice cream shake, banana split**

Iwaizumi: lmao what ass

Oikawa: oh so last night-

Iwaizumi: SHUTUP 

Tanaka: no no last night what  🤔

Nishinoya: we need to know 

Kuroo: yeah what happened last night 😏

Bokuto: ooo i think i know what happeneddd 😧

Sugawara: **pull up to the light and i told him whoop-whoop, pull over that ass too fat**

Daichi: Who

Bokuto: ME 

Kuroo: yeah his ass is pretty fat....

Tanaka: yeah 

Nishinoya: yeah

Iwaizumi: yeah...

Oikawa: i’d be mad if i didn’t agree 🙄 .

Hinata: uhm i agree too 

Asahi: ok we all agree now what were you guys saying??

Nishinoya: you agree?-

Akaashi: **tell yo boyfriend you don’t want him no more, you found you a ** wit some racks** ** 💰 **

Sugawara:  🥰

Kenma:  💓💓💓

Oikawa:  🥵🥵

Iwaizumi:  😐 ?

Bokuto: NO AKAASHI IS MINE ONLY

Kuroo: kenma 😸 .....

Kageyama: **Open your door, take you to the store, let you buy what you want**

Hinata: meat buns 🥺

Kageyama: sure boke 🙄💓

Asahi: very nice of you Kageyama

Nishinoya: he used a heart 😳

Hinata: he always uses a heart ? 

Tanaka: 🤭

Ennoshita: he does?

Sugawara: **i like oikawa cuz he bad** ** 🥵 **

Iwaizumi: i beg your pardon 😁 🔪

Oikawa: **i like suga, he got that ass** ** 🤭 **

Daichi: That ass is mine 😐

Sugawara: oh 😳

Ennoshita: period sis get some 😼

Kenma: **i like akaashi he got cash** ** 😚 **

Bokuto:  😁 .

Kuroo:  🤔 oh really?

Kenma: **we go out sometimes he spazz** ** 💓 **

Asahi: what does that mean

Nishinoya: don’t worry about it

Tanaka: just sit back and observe 💅🏽

Ennoshita: surprised you know the word observe 💆🏽♀️

Oikawa: **wassup Suga** ** ❤️ **

Sugawara: **wassup Oikawa** ** 💅🏽💓 **

Kenma: **wassup Akaashi** ** 🥰 **

Akaashi: **damn i want all 3** ** 🥶 **

Iwaizumi: no

Kageyama: **ooo Hinata.....Hinata, i get hard when he walk past me**

Ennoshita: **cuz he thick** ** 🤭 **

Hinata: Ennoshita you too? 🤯

Asahi: girl i give up.....

Asahi has left the group

Nishinoya: y’all made jesus quit 😭

Tanaka: nooo not jesus 😭😭

Kenma: **t-t-t-t-thick t-t-t-t-t-thick**

Kageyama: **t-t-t-t-thick**

Akaashi: **he make me stutter** ** 😳 **

Sugawara: **and his friends** ** 💆🏽♀️ **

Ennoshita: **they t-t-t-t-thick**

Iwaizumi: why are y’all like this....

Kenma: **t-t-t-t-t-thick t-t-t-t-t-thick**

Ennoshita: **fuck i want all of em** ** 🤯 **

Bokuto: you can’t have my akaashi 😠

Kuroo: murder on my mind 🥰

Kageyama: **wassup Kenma, wassup Akaashi**

Daichi: why do y’all keep saying wassup?

Akaashi: **i hit it raw he see me in public**

Kenma: **like wassup friend** ** 😳 **

Kuroo: that’s kinda...

Bokuto: kinda...

Kuroo:  😳

Bokuto: yeah 😳

Tanaka: ew? 😭

Sugawara: **he talk too much** ** 🤭 **

Oikawa: **but i still hit** ** 💓 **

Iwaizumi: i’m about to hit you in a second 😐

Oikawa: i like pain 💅🏽

Tanaka: okay yeah ew 😭

Nishinoya: i could’ve gone my whole life without hearing that

Kageyama: **cuz he a fool on that d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-dick** ** 🤭 **

Kuroo: ooo chibi-chan’s got a secret 🤭

Tanaka: gonna act like i didn’t saw that 😼😼

Nishinoya: i might have to join Asahi after that shit 😃

Sugawara: **pop that ass throw it**

Akaashi: **kill the** ** 😸 , covid **

Sakusa has entered the chat

Sakusa: gross. 

Sakusa has left the chat

Iwaizumi: how the fuck did he- 

Daichi: I don’t have anything to say...

Kenma: **spread them legs, don’t close it**

Nishinoya: Kuroo is bottom?

Tanaka: wow i didn’t expect that 

Kuroo: NO 

Bokuto: it’s okay bro

Ennoshita: **i’m not lame i’ll never expose ya** ** 💆🏽♀️ **

Nishinoya: period 😼

Tanaka: i approve this message ✍🏽

Sugawara: **just had a baby, tryna cut the lights off**

Daichi: A BABY WITH WHO

Iwaizumi:  😬😬😬 yikes

Sugawara: **bitch fuck them stretch marks bend it over right now** ** 🙇🏽♀️ **

Oikawa: i will  🥰

Iwaizumi: no the hell you won’t  😐

Kageyama: **wassup Kenma**

Kenma: **you smash my partner, you can’t have a relationship with me**

Oikawa: **club Godzilla, i cant smash no duck for free**

Iwaizumi: i heard Godzilla?

Tanaka: he cares about Godzilla more than his boyfriend 🤭

Daichi: That’s messed up

Iwaizumi: that’s not true

Nishinoya: .... 😬

Iwaizumi: he knows i love him 🙄

Oikawa: aww iwa-chan (^‿ ◕ )

Kageyama: **get that bread get that head then leave, where my keys?**

Hinata: Kags you always spend the night though....

Tanaka: spend the night 😳

Nishinoya: ALWAYS???

Hinata: yeah we play games 😁

Daichi: suddenly i’m jared, 19 😃

Oikawa: **wassup Suga** ** 🙇🏽♀️ **

Sugawara: **wassup Oikawa** ** 😻 **

Kenma: **wassup Akaashi**

Akaashi: **damn i want all 3** ** ❤️😹 **

Tanaka: didn’t y’all say this already 

Bokuto: am i not enough Akaashi 🥺

Akaashi: more than enough, bokuto-san 💓

Bokuto: Akaashiiiiii 🥺🥺

Kageyama: **Hinata....Hinata, i get hard when he walk past me**

Hinata: stoppp 😖

Kageyama: **cause he thick**

Ennoshita: **t-t-t-t-t-thick t-t-t-t-t-thick**

Oikawa: **t-t-t-t-t-thick** ** 😛 **

Iwaizumi: last straw 😐

Oikawa: wha-

Iwaizumi: i’m coming over.

Nishinoya: he about to get punished 🤭🤭

Tanaka: OMGKSKDKSKDKAMS

Kenma: **he make me stutter** ** ❤️ **

Hinata: kenma 😖

Kenma: Shoyo ❤️

Kuroo: how about no??

Kageyama: yeah no 😐

Ennoshita: **and his friends**

Sugawara: **they t-t-t-t-thick t-t-t-t-t-thick** ** 🤯 **

Oikawa: **t-t-t-t-t-thick, fuck i want all of em** ** 🤭 **

Iwaizumi: oh you’re still going 😸

Oikawa: WAIT IT WAS JUST A LYRIC PRANK

Iwaizumi: too late, get the cuffs

Daichi: oh wow....

Hinata:  😧😧😧

Sugawara: uhm....good luck charlie 😁

Daichi: you’re gonna need luck too

Sugawara: HUH 

Daichi: open the door.

Ennoshita: get some sis 🤭

Kageyama: i still don’t understand this

Nishinoya: you don’t understand what? 

Kenma: i’m going back to my game....

Kuroo: don’t you have anything to say?

Kenma: bye Shoyo ❤️

Hinata: BYE KENMA 😁

Kuroo: seriously 😃

Kageyama: boke...

Hinata: volleyball?  🥺🥺 please

Kageyama: come over...

Nishinoya: guys i don’t think they’re gonna play volleyball  😅

Tanaka: Das none of my business....Das none of my business  😅

Nishinoya: What happened to Bokuto and Akaashi???

Ennoshita: Someone is getting railed bye 😹

Tanaka: ......bye guys ima jus head out 😸


	3. Kiss, marry, kill

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pretty setters play kiss, marry, kill with their boyfriends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There’s a lot of stan twitter video references so i hope you all understand😭
> 
> if you don’t i’m sorry😭
> 
> if you’re unaware of the rules of KMK:
> 
> Basically there’s 3 choices (kiss, marry, kill) and you choose out of 3 people who you’d kiss, marry, or kill. 
> 
> simple :p

Pretty setters 💅🏽

Oikawa: hey guys 😁

Akaashi: hey

Kageyama: hi

Oikawa: oh ur still here lol.

Sugawara: be nice :)

Kenma: what do y’all want 

Oikawa: i want to play a game im so boredddd

Akaashi: what kind of game?

Kenma: game? 

Kageyama: i’m bored too so 

Oikawa: ....anyway so i think we should add our boyfriends again so we can play a game 😼

Sugawara: okay yeah but what game 

Oikawa: OOO how about kiss, marry, kill 

Akaashi: this isn’t going to end well 🚶🏽

Kenma: does it ever?

Kageyama: nope 

Akaashi: fair point 

Sugawara: yeah they’re not wrong 

Oikawa: come on y’all have literally nothing to lose 

Kageyama: dignity? 

Oikawa: you had dignity-

Sugawara: oop- ksdiakdknahsbs

Kageyama: yes????

Kenma: are we playing a game or not

Akaashi: i have something to do later so can we make this quick 

Oikawa: yes i’ll add them now  😁

Oikawa added Iwaizumi, Hinata, Bokuto, Kuroo, and Daichi

Oikawa: HI GUYS

Hinata: hi!! 😁

Oikawa: hi chibi-chan 🥺🥺

Bokuto: HINATA HEY!

Kenma: hey

Kuroo: don’t y’all love it when kenma....  😺

Iwaizumi: what’s goin on 

Sugawara: we want to play a game

Daichi: what kind of game?

Kageyama: kiss, marry, kill 

Iwaizumi: i mean okay...i got nothin better to do

Akaashi: okay anyway who wants to go first

Bokuto: meeeee

Oikawa: okay bokuto uhm.....

Oikawa: kiss, marry, kill.......me, Suga, and Hinata

Bokuto: marry Akaashi 🥺 , kiss Hinata, kill Suga.......sorry i can’t kill Hinata

Sugawara: understandable....have a nice day

Daichi: Akaashi wasn’t even a choice?

Kageyama: yeah what about Oikawa? 

Bokuto: .....oh....well then i’d marry suga, kiss hinata, and kill Oikawa

Oikawa: bitch- 

Kenma: lmfaoooo

Akaashi: moving on LMAO before people get their feelings hurt 

Oikawa: i’m people and my feelings are already hurt, thanks. 

Oikawa: Tobio-chan you go next

Kuroo: kiss, marry, kill; Akaashi, Kenma, andChibi-chan

Iwaizumi: that’s not fair we already know who he’s gonna marry

Kuroo: doesn’t matter 

Kageyama: marry hinata obviously...then we could play volleyball together forever

Hinata: really  🥺

Hinata: you wanna?  🥺

Daichi: are you gonna answer the rest of the question.....

Kageyama: of course boke

Kageyama: oh yeah kiss Akaashi and kill Kenma because he scares me

Kenma: good. 

Hinata: i cant marry you if you kill Kenma, sorry kags 🤭

Kageyama: i’m not really gonna kill him???

Kenma: he chose me, he don’t want you 😛

Kuroo: just pretend i don’t exist then i guess

Iwaizumi: can we ever just stick to the game?

Kageyama: nah he definitely wants me 🙃

Daichi: please don’t 

Sugawara: and you know what i-  😳

Akaashi: what was that? 🤔

Oikawa: ok- 🚶🏽

Bokuto: can we get back to the game i’m boreddd 🥺

Akaashi: yes bokuto-san

Bokuto: okay! Hinata

Hinata: yes 😁

Bokuto: Kuroo, Iwaizumi, and me

Hinata: well...... 

Akaashi: choose wisely 😌

Hinata: marry Bokuto, kiss Iwaizumi, and kill Kuroo

Akaashi: good boy 

Kuroo: what? why kill me???

Hinata: so Kenma doesn’t go to jail for doing it 💅🏽

Kenma: aww Shoyo 🥺

Kuroo: ????

Daichi: i guess we’re all skipping over that “good boy”  😃

Sugawara: yeah and

Bokuto: you’d marry me 🥺🥺

Kageyama: anyway. it’s Daichi’s turn. 

Kenma: someone is sounding jealous 😹

Oikawa: lmfaooo stop jsjdjshdsns 😭

Kageyama:  😐

Iwaizumi: okay yeah anyway.....Daichi; Kenma, Oikawa, Akaashi

Daichi: marry Akaashi, kiss Kenma, kill Oikawa

Sugawara: wow it was that easy for you

Daichi: i mean yeah it’s not like i have to actually do it

Oikawa: i’m too pretty for you anyway 🙃

Iwaizumi: says who 😹

Oikawa: ( ง ’̀-‘́) ง

Iwaizumi: i’m kidding 

Sugawara: that’s her?? 

Kenma: oh lord

Akaashi: she look like a bitch on wheels 🤭

Kenma: lemme hurry up and get her done with 🚶🏽

Iwaizumi: nvm i hate you all. game over.

Oikawa: wait iwa-chan  (ू ˃̣̣̣̣̣̣ ︿ ˂̣̣̣̣̣̣ ू )

Iwaizumi: GAME OVER 


	4. A day of peace (kinda?)

Pretty setters 💅🏽

Kageyama: guys 

Sugawara: yeah? 

Kenma: hey what’s up 

Akaashi: is the sky falling??

Oikawa: hello everyone 

Kageyama: i love y’all 

Oikawa: i- 

Kenma: you okay?

Sugawara: yeah what’s wrong 

Akaashi: talk to us 

Kageyama: nothing is wrong lmao

Oikawa: you’d tell us if something was wrong right

Kageyama: of course

Akaashi: good

Kenma: we love you too......

Sugawara: yeah we love you so much 

Akaashi: yeah kiss me rn

Kageyama: >//<

Oikawa: i wanna kiss 🥺

Akaashi: everyone gets kisses

Kenma: i think you broke Kageyama

Sugawara: akdkakdkandkabs omg 

Kageyama: i’m fine 

Oikawa: tobio-chan what made you tell us you love us

Sugawara:  👀

Kageyama: uhm i just felt like it ? 

Akaashi: he’s lying your honor 🙄

Kenma: omg this bitch was boutta get sappy with us 😹

Oikawa: aidisjdjdicnsocna 

Kageyama: i take it back i don’t love y’all 

Kenma: omggg we’re kidding pls 😭😭

Sugawara: byeee 😭😭😭😭

Sugawara: shutup you love us so much 

Akaashi: ajdkaosjsj he loves us so hard 😼

Oikawa: so hardddd 🥱

Kageyama: i’m literally blocking all of you

Kenma: omg bae wait

Akaashi: don’t do it bae 😖

Sugawara: waitttt

Kageyama: what 

Sugawara: Cash app me first 😼💅🏽

Oikawa: ME TOO 

Kageyama: i’m not cashapping anyone shit 😭

Oikawa: that’s not very nice 🥱

Akaashi: i didn’t do anything to you pleasefhgdjj LMFAOOO 😭

Kenma: yeah we didn’t do nothin to you  💔

Kageyama: didn’t you threaten me like last week?

Kenma: you touched my games bae 🙄🙄✋🏽

Oikawa: understandable 

Sugawara: it’s been a week for you? i got threatened yesterday

Akaashi: is this.....favoritism?  🤭

Oikawa: oh my god Kenma has a favorite and it’s not me?????

Kenma: It’s not favoritism 

Kageyama: then what is it 😂

Kenma: if anything Akaashi is my favorite 

Akaashi: is that right bae 😼

Kenma: yeah bae 💓

Akaashi: stop before i kiss you  😌

Kenma: kiss me bae 😛

Oikawa: oh dear....that’s not good 😳

Sugawara: i feel the need to say the f word now 😳

Kageyama: wait i thought i was bae 💔

Oikawa: he liked the attention 😌💅🏽

Kageyama: no 😸

Kenma: you can be bae again another time 

Akaashi: yeah sorry but kenma is bae rn ❤️

Kenma: no you’re bae 😳💓

Sugawara: when can i be bae

Sugawara: i want kisses 

Akaashi: you can get kisses anytime 😌

Kenma: yeah 💓

Oikawa: anytime? 

Kageyama: not you ❤️

Oikawa: bold of you to assume i would kiss you

Kageyama: bold of you to assume i couldn’t get you to

Oikawa: kiss me then.

Sugawara: (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄

Akaashi: are they flirting or threatening eachother ????

Kenma: KISS

Kenma: but let us watch ❤️

Akaashi: i- i kinda wanna see it 🤭

Kageyama: we’re not kissing 

Oikawa: we’re not?

Sugawara: you’re not? 😖

Kenma: oh come on i wanted to see that

Akaashi: Oikawa sounds a little disappointed 🤭

Oikawa: i am not

Kageyama: so you do wanna kiss me 😛

Oikawa: ⁄(⁄ ⁄•⁄-⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄ 

Sugawara: how the turn tables 💅🏽

Kenma: just admit you want to so we can watch already 🥱

Akaashi: i think we can all agree we’d kiss eachother 😌

Kenma: you already kiss me tho 

Akaashi: bae shhh 😖

Sugawara: obviously i’d kiss you guys

Kageyama: i’d kiss everyone except Oikawa ;)

Oikawa: why

Kageyama: i’d make you admit you wanna kiss me first 😛

Kenma: he really said  ✨ beg for it ✨

Akaashi: oh wow...

Oikawa: ok i wanna kiss you....so kiss me

Sugawara: oh god

Kageyama: i will 

Akaashi:  😳 haha...guys?

Kenma: shhh let it play out

Oikawa: omg come over 🙄

Kageyama: omw  🙄

Sugawara: this is very aggressive flirting 😳

Akaashi: we should stop them right?

Kenma: probably

Sugawara: i mean it’s the right thing to do

Akaashi: yeah.....

Kenma: okay goodnight guys! 

Akaashi: goodnight bae 💓

Sugawara: goodnightttt 😁

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> do you guys flirt with your friends? i do lmao
> 
> i think it stopped being a joke for oikawa n kags half way through😳😳
> 
> But seriously even though they bully eachother they actually love eachother so much😌
> 
> IF YOU EVER WANNA FIND THE VIDEOS I REFERENCE IN THESE THEN YOU CAN FIND THEM ON PAUL 4.0’S YOUTUBE


	5. a game and apple pie 👨🏽🦲

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Oikawa: hi sisters 👨🏽🦲

Sugawara: hey babes 😙

Akaashi: hey guys 

Kenma: how’d the kiss go  😌

Kageyama: we didn’t really kiss 😭😭😭

Kenma: you just want us to believe that

Oikawa: we were joking i promise 😳

Sugawara: hmmm okay

Akaashi: how unfortunate  🙄

Kageyama: y’all are nasty 😭

Kenma: y’all are the ones who were aggressively flirting with eachother 😹✋🏽

Oikawa: omg 

Sugawara: LMAO 

Oikawa: like you and Akaashi don’t flirt all the time 🙄

Kenma: Akaashi is the loml 🙄💓

Kageyama: what about Kuroo 🤔

Kenma: who?

Kenma: oh him....yes ofc i love him too 😁

Akaashi: he’s joking he definitely loves Kuroo 😹

Kenma: Akaashi i swear to god

Sugawara: what does Akaashi know that we don’t 😳

Oikawa: fill us in bae 😌

Kenma: i will kill you if you say anything 

Kageyama: he won’t 

Kenma: says who???

Sugawara: Akaashi tell us 😁

Akaashi: i 

Kenma: Akaashi 😐

Akaashi: caught 

Kenma: AKAASHI

Akaashi: them 👀

Kenma: bae 🥺

Akaashi: yes bae 😁

Kenma: don’t tell them 

Sugawara: no we need to know

Oikawa: yeah what were they doing

Kageyama: i’m scared to find out 

Kenma: y’all won’t be finding out...right Akaashi 🙂

Akaashi: right bae

Kenma: no kisses for a week....you broke my heart 🙄 .

Akaashi: a week?? this is bullshit

Kageyama: damn that’s crazy 😹

Sugawara: sjdjskds he doesn’t mean that right

Oikawa: come on he didn’t even tell us 😭😭

Kenma: but he was going to 

Akaashi: forgive me?  🥺

Kenma: why should i

Oikawa: because we didn’t even get to know the tea 🙄

Sugawara: ^

Kageyama: yeah ^^

Akaashi: i’ll get you pie bae 🥺🥺

Kenma: ......what kind 

Akaashi: apple

Kenma: hmm....come over

Akaashi: omw  🥺

_ akaashi is offline _

Oikawa: that easy?

Sugawara: it’s Akaashi what did you expect

Oikawa: you’re not wrong....ANYWAY

Oikawa: i texted you guys for a reason

Kageyama: that’s suspicious  🤔

Sugawara: that’s weird ✋🏽

Kenma:  🤔🤔🤔

Oikawa: guysssss 😭😭😭

Sugawara: what was the reason 

Oikawa: i wanna play a game 😙

Sugawara: what was the reason 

Oikawa: i had a reason-

Sugawara: WHAT WAS THE REASON 

Oikawa: i just explained the reason ✋🏽

Sugawara: WhAt wAs thE REaSon BiTCh

Oikawa: i don’t need to explain myself to you 🙄

Kageyama: ....y’all done now?

Kenma: what game though 👀

Oikawa: you know the one where you finish the story  😁

Kageyama: no.

Oikawa:  😦

Kageyama: i said no. 

Kenma: you can kill all that right now 🙄✋🏽

_ akaashi is online _

Akaashi: kenma i got the pie and i’m omw  🥺

Kenma: ok bae just so you know kuroo and bokuto are in the living room playing some game

Akaashi: got it

Kenma: hurry please 🥺

Oikawa: aww kenma misses akaashiiiii 🥺

Sugawara: that’s cute 🥺

Akaashi: okay i’ll hurry :)

_ akaashi is offline  _

Kageyama: wanna play the game for real?

Oikawa: yessss 🙄

Kenma: omg just start the game we all know we’re gonna play it 🙄

Oikawa: Suga you start it 

Sugawara: okay once upon a time

Kenma: there was a group of bad biddies 😛

Oikawa: called the pretty setters 😌

Kageyama: and the pretty setters

Sugawara: decided one day 👀

Kenma: that they should kith 👩❤️💋👩👩❤️💋👩

Oikawa: and so

Kageyama: they kissed 😭

Sugawara: and single handedly 

Kenma: became the baddest bitches

Oikawa: to ever walk the earth 😌

Kageyama: the end

Kageyama: there we played your stupid game 

_ akaashi is online _

Akaashi: come open the door bae 💓

Kenma: BYE GUYS. 

_ kenma and akaashi are offline _

Oikawa: hey it’s not stupid 🙄

Sugawara: another round? 

Oikawa: tobio-chan start it

Kageyama: once upon a time

Sugawara: the pretty setters

_ kenma and akaashi are online _

Kenma: shut the fuck up because im trying to cuddle with my bb 😠

Akaashi: the end ✨

_ kenma and akaashi are offline  _

Sugawara: very aggressive ending 😃

Oikawa: did he say they’re cuddling- i-  🥺

Kageyama: uhmmm y’all better go before he comes back mad 😅

Sugawara: yeahhhh bye guys 😳

Oikawa: ttyl 💓

_ everyone is offline  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guys akaashi just caught kenma and kuroo cuddling haha😳
> 
> also loml means love of my life if you didn’t already know😭
> 
> kenma doesn’t want anybody to know he actually loves kuroo👨🏽🦲


	6. Gun to your head

Kenma: hey guys 

Akaashi: hey 

Sugawara: hey babes what’s up 

Kageyama: hey

Oikawa: hi guysss

Kenma: i’m so bored

Oikawa: wanna play a game 😼

Akaashi: you know Karlie

Kageyama: i’ve really been your friend for a while

Sugawara: but you’re starting to piss me off ✋🏽

Oikawa: why do yall bully me 💔

Kenma: you make it too easy babe 😹

Oikawa: can we please play 🥺

Sugawara: don’t we always 

Kageyama: ^

Akaashi: what game

Oikawa: gun to your head

Kenma: should we add our boyfriends

Kageyama: yeah it’ll be more fun 

Sugawara: ^

Oikawa added Iwaizumi, Hinata, Bokuto, Kuroo, and Daichi

Hinata: hi everyone 😁

Kageyama: hey babe 💓

Kageyama: boke** /(/ /•/ -/•/ /)/

Bokuto: HEY!

Sugawara: YOU CALL HIM BABE 🥺

Hinata: yeah! and i call him- 

Kageyama: my name. he calls me by my name.

Daichi: that’s not very convincing at all

Kuroo: Chibi-chan go ahead and tell us what you call him 🤔

Kenma: if your name is daddy then i guess that’s true 🙄

Kageyama: how would you know what he calls me 🤨

Kenma: you in my business? don’t do dat 😹

Iwaizumi: two seconds in and shits already starting 

Akaashi: well we did add y’all for a reason but..

Oikawa: we get it! Tobio-chan and Hinata are fucking eachother! 

Kageyama: /(/ /•/ -/•/ /)/

Oikawa: can we please listen to what i have to say now

Daichi: yeah go ahead 

Sugawara: speak your words sis 💓

Iwaizumi: whats up

Bokuto: i hope it’s something good!

Oikawa: we wanna play a game with you guys 🥺

Iwaizumi: it wasn’t something good 🙄

Kuroo: Bo you jinxed it 😭

Hinata: i like the games we play 

Kenma: this is gonna be an interesting one 

Daichi: this is gonna end bad 

Sugawara: that’s the point 🙄

Daichi: .... 🤔

Sugawara:  🤨

Daichi: ok.

Sugawara: baby ☹️

Daichi: no it’s okay

Bokuto: anyone else confused?

Iwaizumi: yeah what just happened 

Kuroo: they’re communicating 🗣

Akaashi: don’t worry about it

Hinata: i think it was the “ 🙄 ”

Kenma: don’t say it 😭

Kageyama: oh 😬

Oikawa: jesus we didn’t even start the game yet

Kenma: yeah let’s get that started before shit goes down in flames

Oikawa: yeah anyway guys we’re gonna be playing gun to your head 😁

Bokuto: OH I LIKE THAT GAME CAN I START PLEASEEEEE

Akaashi: who wants to ask 

Kenma: i will because there’s something i have to know ☺️

Iwaizumi: that’s gonna end bad for sure

Kenma: Gun to your head, if it’s the last time you guys could have sex would you fuck kuroo or have him fuck you 

Kageyama: oh god that’s a lot to digest

Hinata: that’s something i wish i didn’t imagine

Iwaizumi: what is going on-

Daichi:  😃 huh

Bokuto: probably have him fuck me

Kuroo: ahaha next question please

Kenma: thought you’d say that...

Akaashi: ahhh anyway.....Iwaizumi

Iwaizumi: yes

Akaashi: gun to your head, recite a song perfectly or you die. what song are you gonna recite?

Iwaizumi: fuck

Oikawa: go ahead.....say it  ❤️

Sugawara: LMFAO

Iwaizumi: self righteous by Bryson Tiller .....

Hinata: ooo i know that song 

Kageyama: i GueSs YoU aInT a FReaK nO MoRE

Kuroo: LMFAOOO YOOO

Daichi: not the lyrics lmfaoooo

Akaashi: i love that song 

Kenma: would honestly blast it while getting my back blown ou-let me stop 😹 .

Akaashi: next time 

Kenma: oh 😳

Iwaizumi: can i choose a different song...i don’t think i can listen to that one the same anymore 

Oikawa: like we haven’t done a couple things to that song 😹

Bokuto: you know what i’m just going to pretend i don’t know what any of this means...

Iwaizumi: brb i’m just gonna die rq 

Akaashi: Suga 

Sugawara: yes bae 💓

Akaashi: gun to your head, you have to choose between a restaurant bathroom or a club bathroom to have sex.

Sugawara: club bathroom....if someone walks in i’m sure it won’t be their first time witnessing something like that 

Hinata: restaurant bathroom would be more fun though.....i mean if you’re into that 

Kuroo: i think he’s trying to tell kageyama something 

Bokuto: he’s right though it would be more fun 

Oikawa: it is 💅🏽

Daichi: whats that supposed to mean 

Iwaizumi: ......next person 

Kageyama: wait.....

Iwaizumi: don’t think too hard about it

Akaashi: oh shit 

Sugawara: bae why didn’t you tell us about this  😳

Oikawa: hehe 😁

Kenma: oh wow......Kuroo

Kuroo: if you wanna do it we can  😳

Kenma: no it’s your turn you perv 😭

Daichi: imagine that 💀

Kuroo: oh right....

Kenma: gun to your head, you have to choose between fucking me, Akaashi, or Bokuto

Kuroo: i’d choose you every time kitten ❤️

Kenma: cute but i would’ve chosen Akaashi

Bokuto: should my feelings be hurt 

Akaashi: no 

Bokuto: okay 😁

Kuroo: ....that shit hurted 😳

Sugawara: who wouldn’t choose Akaashi 💓

Daichi:  🤔

Kageyama: uh oh 

Hinata: Daichi gun to your head, you have to tell Suga a fantasy you’ve had about him. What would you say?

Daichi: any fantasy? 

Oikawa: yes any fantasy 

Daichi: well this is kinda embarrassing but....

Iwaizumi: but......

Daichi: uh....marrying him is a fantasy ive had

Sugawara: babyyy 🥺🥺

Bokuto: THATS SO CUTE

Kageyama: wholesome

Daichi: yeah......

Iwaizumi: shittykawa

Oikawa: yes daddy~  😌

Iwaizumi:  😐 chill? 

Oikawa: sorry iwa-chan 💓

Oikawa: you should punish me 😁

Hinata: is it even a punishment if you enjoy it

Kageyama: i wanna erase that moment from my mind 

Iwaizumi: oh my god......

Akaashi: take your time

Bokuto:  😭😭😭

Iwaizumi: i’m just gonna ignore it and continue 

Kenma: yup lmao 

Oikawa:  💔

Iwaizumi: Gun to your head, you gotta kiss anyone here in this chat EXCEPT ME.

Oikawa: suga 😌

Iwaizumi: i feel like that was way too easy for you...

Oikawa: i mean look at him 😼

Sugawara: stop bae 😼💓

Kenma: shes got a point, she’s an icon, she’s a legend, and she is the moment

Daichi: why are y’all like this.....

Sugawara: get used to it

Hinata: USE TO LIVE DOWN BY THE BEACH

Kageyama: and i use to be good on my feet

Akaashi: stan Ricky Montgomery 💅🏽

Kuroo: kitten it’s your turn 💓

Kenma: shit 

Kuroo: alright gun to your head, you gotta wear a maid outfit or cat cosplay 

Kenma: cat cosplay

Akaashi: i wanna see that so bad

Bokuto: same 🥺

Kuroo: would be so hot 😳

Kenma: buy it and i’ll wear it 🙄

Kenma: anyway next 

Hinata: Kags 😁

Kageyama: yes 

Hinata: Gun to your head, you have to lick someone in this chat but it can’t be me.

Bokuto:  😳😳😳

Daichi: no sirrrr 😭

Kageyama: fuck 

Iwaizumi: where does he have to lick them 😳

Hinata: doesn’t matter

Kageyama: Kenma....

Kenma: eh why not 

Kenma: you could lick anywhere

Daichi: are you out of your mind right now 😳

Oikawa: ooou 😳

Sugawara: we knew you had a favorite

Kuroo: he’s only licking his hand 

Bokuto: ^

Kenma: whatever idc 

Kenma: your turn Akaashi 💓

Akaashi: alright bae 😼

Daichi: let me ask this one 

Kenma: okay go ahead

Daichi: alright Akaashi....gun to your head, you have to text someone and they HAVE to reply in one minute or you’re dead

Akaashi: i’d text Kenma or Bokuto 👍🏽

Kuroo: he’d reply to you in a minute?? 

Hinata: yeah he texts back fast

Bokuto: that depends 

Kuroo: what the fuck???

Kenma: lmao 

Iwaizumi: damn that’s tuff 

Oikawa: oh you’re gonna talk when you don’t even reply to me fast

Iwaizumi: YOU SPAM ME THERES ALWAYS SO MUCH TO READ

Oikawa: you read it all 🥺🥺

Iwaizumi: if course i read it all

Oikawa: come over tonight 😁

Iwaizumi: shit- okay 😳

Sugawara: that was cute.....for a moment....

Daichi: yeah then it got real......

Kageyama: disgusting 

Hinata: well have fun i guess 😳

Oikawa: let’s hurry up and get this over with

Oikawa: chibi-chan you’re last

Hinata: aw i was hoping for another round after this

Kenma: apparently their plans have changed 😹

Oikawa: gun to your head, you gotta tell us when the last time you had sex was  😁

Hinata: well....

Kageyama: nope

Hinata: i have to answer though ☹️

Kageyama: doesn’t matter the game is over everyone have a nice day 😁👍🏽

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you wanna know the answer to the last question....... the last time they had sex was— 
> 
> *gets kidnapped*


	7. Who let oikawa drink?

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Oikawa: heyyyy 😁

Sugawara: hey 

Kenma:  🤙🏽

Kageyama: what’s up 

Akaashi: hey 🤙🏽

Kenma: we’re not starting this here 💀

Sugawara: starting what

Kenma: he keeps copying everything i do 💀

Akaashi: no i don’t 💀

Kageyama: why tho lmao

Kenma: to annoy me 😭

Akaashi: i’m not doing anything 😭

Oikawa: guysssss 🥺

Sugawara: yeah? 

Oikawa: you’re all so hotttt 🥺

Kenma: uhm 😸

Akaashi: that was random 😸

Kageyama: thanks? 

Sugawara: you okay?

Oikawa: i’m fineee 😁

Oikawa: kiss me pls all of you

Akaashi: dude what’d you do 😭

Kenma: i’ll give you a kiss

Oikawa: really 🥺

Kageyama: don’t encourage him  💀

Sugawara: Oikawa what’d you do

Oikawa: i had a tinyyyy bit to drink 😁

Kenma: so no head

Akaashi: stop 💀💀

Kageyama: oh god 

Sugawara: Oikawa babe make me admin please 💓

Oikawa: okaayy 🥺

Oikawa: anything for you  💓

_ oikawa made sugawara admin  _

_ sugawara added iwaizumi  _

Sugawara: get him 

Iwaizumi: no

_ iwaizumi left the group _

_sugawara added iwaizumi_

Sugawara: GET HIM

Iwaizumi: god 

Kenma: isn’t he your boyfriend tho

Kageyama: ^

Akaashi: ^^

Iwaizumi: yeah and? he came to bother y’all, tuff shit. 

Oikawa: iwa-chan~ 🥺🥺🥺

Iwaizumi: yes baby 😁

Akaashi: the way he switched up lmfao 💀

Oikawa: come back pleaseee 🥺

Sugawara: what did you do to him 

Iwaizumi: I DIDNT DO SHIT

Kenma: very believable 

Kageyama: why was he drinking 

Iwaizumi: he wanted to ??? 

Akaashi: why aren’t you with him 

Iwaizumi: omg i walked away for two seconds because he’s so damn clingy

Oikawa: ...that’s not nice iwa-chan

Iwaizumi: sorry

Kageyama: well make sure he doesn’t hurt himself or something

Kenma: aw kageyama cares

Akaashi: cute 

Sugawara: iwaizumi i’m gonna kick your ass

Iwaizumi: what? why???

Sugawara: why would you let him drink

Iwaizumi: he said he wanted to so we drank together 🙄

Akaashi: and why aren’t you with him 

Kenma: ^ 

Iwaizumi: because he’s 1000x clingier than normal 

Kageyama: rip 

Kenma: okay well go be with him this is your own fault 

Oikawa: kenma 

Kenma: yes 

Oikawa: kisses?  🥺

Kenma: i don’t like the taste of alcohol 

Akaashi: that’s your only problem?  😭

Kageyama: LMFAO

Oikawa: pleaseeee

Kenma: a quick kiss

Iwaizumi: nobody is kissing anyone 

Sugawara: kenma stop exploiting drunk people please

Kenma: you know i only said it to get him to shutup 🙄

Oikawa: why a quick kiss 😾

Akaashi: okay enough 

Kageyama: he said “i have to  ✨ intervene ✨ ”

Oikawa: if you want a kiss too Akaashi you can have one 

Akaashi: you have a boyfriend, go kiss him

Oikawa: he doesn’t have to know ❤️

Iwaizumi: i’m never leaving you 5 alone with eachother 😃

Sugawara: please get him 

Iwaizumi: his head is in my lap 🙄

Kageyama: gross don’t text us while you’re getting a bj  😭

Akaashi: LMFAO WOW

Iwaizumi: omg....i’m not getting one jesus christ

Kenma: he probably wants one 😹

Iwaizumi: if it would shut him up 🙄

Sugawara: we do not wanna hear about your dick being in oikawas mouth okay 

Oikawa: you want one 👀

Iwaizumi: no not while you’re drunk 

Kenma: morals ❤️

Kageyama: make him go to bed

Oikawa: i just want affection 🥺

Akaashi: autocorrect is working overtime for him lmaoooo

Oikawa: sugaaaa 🥺

Sugawara: yes

Oikawa: baby 🥺

Sugawara: yes

Oikawa: come over i want you

Kenma: i spit out my drink

Akaashi: what did he just say- 

Iwaizumi: idc anymore 🙄

Sugawara: i’m sure he didn’t mean it like that

Kageyama: what else could he mean

Oikawa: i want cuddles

Sugawara: cuddle with iwaizumi 

Oikawa: he doesn’t want me to throw up on him 

Kageyama: i don’t think any of us want that

Oikawa: who asked

Kageyama: oh wow 💀 ...

Kenma: lmfao this is a disaster 

Oikawa: ooo guys wanna play a game

Akaashi: no games right now 

Sugawara: yeah no games

Oikawa: babes 🥺

Sugawara: sorry 😾

Iwaizumi: definitely never leaving you two alone with eachother 😐

Kenma: imagine 😭😭

Kageyama: oop 😭

Akaashi: oikawa put your phone down and try to fall asleep 

Sugawara: ^

Oikawa: no 

Iwaizumi: y’all really think if i could get his phone out of his hand he’d still be here? 

Kageyama: he does always have an oddly strong grip on his phone 😭

Sugawara: lay down for me please

Oikawa: for you 🥺

Sugawara: yes let iwaizumi bring you to bed 

Oikawa: are you gonna come cuddle with me 🥺

Kenma: god please...someone cuddle with him so he can go to sleep

Iwaizumi: he’s in bed but he’s not letting me touch him now

Kageyama: why 

Iwaizumi: i don’t know he was literally just clinging to me 

_ kageyama is offline _

Oikawa: suga 

Sugawara: yes

Oikawa: come over please

Sugawara: hold on....let me call Daichi 

_ oikawa is offline _

Kenma: he replaced you lmfao 

Akaashi: hush

Akaashi: he just wants to see suga

Iwaizumi: he did not 😐

Sugawara: iwaizumi?

Iwaizumi: sure come over idc

Sugawara: make sure he’s fine until i get there

Iwaizumi: yeah yeah 

_ iwaizumi left the group _

Kenma: finally we can all sleep now GOODNIGHT 

Akaashi: i think kageyama has been gone for a while but anyway goodnight yall 😭

Sugawara: goodnight guys ❤️

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fun fact actually really really sad fact😳✋🏽......oikawa likes being with suga when he’s drunk because his caring nature😌
> 
> also remember kids, never say yes to a drunk person’s sexual advances.....be like Iwaizumi💅🏽


	8. Who let oikawa drink pt. 2

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Oikawa: Hi guys sorry about that yesterday 😬

Akaashi: it’s all good lmao

Kenma: you okay now babe? 

Oikawa: yeah iwa-chan and suga took good care of me

Kageyama: so you think we’re hot

Oikawa: shutup i was drunk

Kageyama: a drunken mans thoughts-

Kageyama: no

Kageyama: a sober mans thoughts

Kageyama: fuck 

Sugawara: take your time

Kageyama: a drunken mans words are a sober mans thoughts 

Oikawa: well would you all be in this group chat if you weren’t attractive? 

Akaashi: he has a point 

Kenma: i’m sorry but kageyama struggling with that quote has me rollin 😭😭😭

Oikawa: anyway 

Kenma: do you still want those kisses

Oikawa: /(/ /•/-/•/ /)/

Akaashi: we knew you had a thing for suga but kenma too? wow  😼

Sugawara: a thing for me? is that what we’re calling it

Oikawa: i do not have a thing for anybody except iwa-chan 

Kageyama: you wouldn’t even let him touch you last night lmao

Kenma: ^

Sugawara: Oikawa was asleep on his chest by the time i got there

Akaashi: how’d you get in 🤔

Sugawara: spare key 

Kageyama: why do you have a spare key 😨

Sugawara: stay out of grown folks business 😌❤️

Kenma: LMFAOOO

Oikawa: how come when i woke up you and iwa-chan were sandwiching me huh 🤨

Sugawara: well when i came in and sat on the bed you woke up andimmediately made me cuddle with you

Akaashi: sounds about right

Kageyama: what about iwaizumi though

Oikawa: yeah what about iwa-chan

Sugawara: he looked a little....sad(?) when you moved away from him to come to me so he probably just joined us later on 

Kenma: omg oikawa go cuddle with that big baby right now 😭

Akaashi: sounds like someone actually loves when you’re clingy 😌

Oikawa:  🥺🥺🥺 omg i’ll brb 

_ oikawa is offline _

Kageyama: well wtf

_oikawa is online_

Oikawa: *2 video attachments*

Oikawa: GUYS LOOK AT HIS BLUSHING FACE

Kageyama: he’s never gonna live this moment down 

Akaashi: pretty sure he’s gonna break your finger the next time you put it in his face

Oikawa: he wouldn’t dare 😾

Kenma: do it again to see how he reacts

Oikawa: *voice message*

_ oikawa is offline  _

Kageyama: do not listen to that. 

Kenma: OH GOD

Kageyama: WHY WOULD YOU LISTEN TO IT

Kenma: SINCE WHEN DO I LISTEN TO YOU

Akaashi: jesus christ

Sugawara: wow i’m never gonna be able to get the sound of his moans out of my mind 😃

Kenma: oh really we assumed you’ve heard them before 

Sugawara: why would i have heard—

Akaashi: we just kinda assumed y’all have yk...

Kageyama: i mean can you blame us have y’all seen the way y’all act lmfao

Sugawara: absolutely tf not 🙄

Kenma: i mean come on you dropped everything to go cuddle with him when his boyfriend was right there 😭

Sugawara: that doesn’t mean i’ve fucked him

Akaashi: fair enough

Kageyama: why would he even send that to us 😭

Sugawara: i doubt it was on purpose 

Kenma: yeah that fall sounded pretty hard

Akaashi: kenma this is your fault 😭

Kenma: what??? tf did i do? 

Akaashi: dO It aGAiN tO seE hOw hE ReACTs

Kageyama:  😬😬😬

Sugawara: i’m gonna go cry now 

Kenma: literally traumatized bye 

_ everyone is offline  _

** hour later  **

_ everyone is online  _

Oikawa: HI GUYS

Kenma: how can you be so cheery after that

Oikawa: after...?

Sugawara: scroll up babe

Akaashi: i thought we were done with this 😭

Oikawa: oh my god

Kageyama:  😭😭

Oikawa: well that’s not good 😬

Oikawa: did y’all atleast enjoy it

Kenma: you’re disgusting 😭😭

Akaashi: seriously are you okay 

Sugawara: ^

Oikawa: yeah i like when iwa-chan is rough 

✌🏽 ( ◕ ‿ ◕ )

Akaashi: i wish i didn’t ask that 

Kageyama: gross gross gross

_ kageyama is offline _

Sugawara: welp he’s gone  😭

Kenma: why’s iwaizumi even at your house

Oikawa: roommates gone for the weekend

✌🏽 ( ◕ ‿ ◕ )

Sugawara: did you tell him the audio got sent here

Oikawa: oh should i

Akaashi: he’d probably wanna know if someone heard.....all of that 😃

Oikawa: okay one second i think he’s getting out the shower

Oikawa: i have to see this  ✌🏽 ( ◕ ‿-)

Kenma: oh how i wish i could see that

Akaashi: ...?

Kenma: oh come on he has nice muscles 😾

Akaashi: agreeable

Sugawara: yeah he looks really good with his shirt off

Oikawa: i’d appreciate if we all stopped mind fucking my boyfriend 😾

Sugawara: anyway did you tell him 

Oikawa: hold on i’m gonna play it for him

Kenma: is that a good idea-

Oikawa: *voice message*

_ oikawa is offline  _

Kenma: Oikawa is REALLY vocal 🌚

Akaashi: so are you

Sugawara: they are unbelievable.....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> two updates in one day what 😨
> 
> Kageyama has had enough 😭


	9. Kenma cat

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Kenma: *1 picture attachment*

Oikawa: period 😳😳

Akaashi: oh fuck it came

Sugawara: kenma in a cat cosplay is something i never knew i needed

Kageyama: you look nice

Kenma: i kinda like it.....

Akaashi: did you show Kuroo and Bokuto yet 😳

Kenma: i sent them the same picture

Akaashi: i wanna see you in it 

Kenma: i just sent the picture 🙄

Akaashi: no

Akaashi: in person

Sugawara: horny akaashi hours 

Oikawa: don’t be shy send us more pics babe

Kageyama: ^

Kenma: *3 picture attachments* 

Kenma: pervs  🚶🏽

Sugawara: let me feed you 💅🏽

Oikawa: let me run your bath water 😳

Kageyama: whatever you desire 🚶🏽

Akaashi: you’re so hot

Kenma: /(/ /•/-/•/ /)/ shush 

Akaashi: no ❤️

Oikawa: WHAT DID BOKUTO AND KUROO SAY ABOUT IT  🌚

Kageyama: calm down it’s not that serious 💀

Sugawara: what’d they sayyyy

Kenma: .....something 

Akaashi:  🤔

Kenma: well i think i broke Bokuto.....and Kuroo said things Kuroo says 😁

Kageyama: pretending i never saw that 😼

Akaashi: can i come over later  🥺👉🏽👈🏽

Kenma: you just wanna fuck me 🙄🙄

Oikawa: *gagging noises* nasty 

Sugawara: we heard you and your boyfriend having sex...you have no room to talk 😹😹

Oikawa: but did y’all enjoy it 😌

Kageyama: can we please never talk about that again 

Akaashi: why would we enjoy that

Kenma: it was traumatizing honestly but i can admit he does have nice moans 😌

Oikawa: thanks babe 🥺

Akaashi: kenma  😐

Sugawara: uh oh possessive akaashi hours too 😳

Kageyama:  😳

Kenma: akaashi 😾😾

Akaashi:  🤔

Kenma: sorry bb 😾❤️

Kageyama: he’s definitely not sorry 

Oikawa: uh oh someone is gonna get it tonighttttt 😳

Sugawara: atleast he said sorry at all 😭

Kageyama: not kenma being soft for akaashi though 😳

Kenma: i’ll kill you 😐

Akaashi: ....

Kenma: come over 🙄

Oikawa: and that’s on  ✨ make up sex ✨

Sugawara:  🌚🌚

Akaashi: text me back 😾

Kenma: no ❤️

Akaashi: i’ll say it in the group chat if you don’t text me back 😁

Kageyama: say it. you won’t. 

Kenma: i already texted him back 🙄

Oikawa: what did he say

Sugawara: ^ 😳

Akaashi: y’all wanna know 😌

Kenma: akaashi istg

Akaashi: can’t tell y’all sorry

Kageyama: why not

Akaashi: i’d be putting my life in danger 😁

Oikawa: send screenshots ❤️

Sugawara: come on tell ussss 🥺

Kenma: i’m so close to killing all of you.

Akaashi: that’s not very cash money of you bb 😾

Kenma: fuck you

Akaashi: you wanna 

Oikawa: when did akaashi get so sassy 😳

Kenma: i do not.

Akaashi: mmm but you just said you wanna ride me

Kageyama: oh so that’s why y’all were texting privately  😃

Sugawara: kenmaaaa 😳😳

Oikawa: OH

Kenma: i’m literally gonna kill you 😁

Akaashi: ok bb ❤️

Kageyama: let’s change the subject 😁❤️

Sugawara: never assumed kenma would like being on top

Akaashi: there’s a lot of surprising things that he likes 

Oikawa: our little kenma is a big freak 😨

Kageyama: god no

_ kageyama is offline  _

Oikawa: weak 🙄

Kenma: i’m never talking to you guys again

Kenma: and akaashi i hate you 

Akaashi: do you really 

Kenma: yup. i only love your dick. 🙄

Akaashi: that makes me sad bb 💔

Sugawara: we didn’t see that coming 

Oikawa: we didn’t  😳

Sugawara: if you’re saying you saw it coming you’re lying ✋🏽

Oikawa: you’re lying  😳

Sugawara: whew 😳😳

Kenma: you have to play video games with me tonight 

Kenma: no sex.  ✋🏽

Akaashi: bj? 

Kenma: no. 

Akaashi: hj?? 😾

Kenma: not touching you at all.

Akaashi: cruel 

Akaashi: but fine

Sugawara: enoughhh we get itttt you guys are in love  🙄

Oikawa: uhmmmm....i’m gonna call iwa-chan see ya later guysss 😁

_oikawa is offline_

Sugawara: wow.... i guess this is who we are. 

_ everyone is offline _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys so i know i normally update early in the morning but i’m a little late today so take Horny+Possesive+Sassy Akaashi hours 😌
> 
> Suga is tired and Kageyama is tired-er 😭😭
> 
> let’s hope Oikawa and Iwaizumi just had a normal conversation✋🏽
> 
> anyway i hope you’re all doing well


	10. Pretty setters stan megan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song- big ole freak by megan thee stallion
> 
> you don’t have to turn it on but if you’d like to^
> 
> lyrics are in bold

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Oikawa: GUYS 

Kenma: yes? 

Akaashi: what’s up 

Oikawa: I WAS LISTENING TO MEGAN AND I THINK WE SHOULD DO A LYRIC PRANK ON OUR BFS

Kageyama:  🤔

Sugawara: what song

Oikawa: big ole freak 😼

Akaashi: kenma?

Kenma: sure why not

Akaashi: ok im in

Kageyama: same i’m bored

Sugawara: ^ 

Oikawa: okay get ready 🙊

_ Oikawa added Iwaizumi, Hinata, Bokuto, Kuroo, and Daichi _

Iwaizumi: this finna be some bullshit. i can sense it.

Daichi: let’s see what they have to say before we jump to conclusions 

Sugawara: **big ole freak** ** 🤭 **

Daichi: WHAT

Oikawa: **big booty, big ole treat** ** 😽 **

Iwaizumi: girl wtf is you talkin about

Kuroo: u don’t even have an ass 💀

Iwaizumi:  🤔 nah. i’m the only one that gets to talk about his ass. 

Kenma: **ima make him wait for the** ** 😽 **

Bokuto:  😳

Akaashi: **hit it til he big ole skeet**

Kuroo: fuck

Hinata: what’s happening 😨

Sugawara: **feet on the bed**

Kageyama: **i’ll fuck him up in the head**

Hinata: and that’s on being fucked  ✨ senseless ✨

Bokuto: i- what now 😃

Hinata: chile anyway so....

Oikawa: **suck it then look in his eyes**

Iwaizumi:  👀👀

Kenma: **then the next day i might leave em on read**

Kuroo: like u don’t already do that  🙄

Bokuto: tragic 💔

Akaashi: **pop it, pop it, daydreamin bout how i rock it**

Bokuto: how’d you know  🙊

Kuroo: perhaps 

Hinata:  🤭

Oikawa: **he hit my phone wit a horse so i know that mean come over and ride it**

Iwaizumi: i mean if you want....

Oikawa: **shit i’m on the way** ** 😌 **

Sugawara: **ride on that dick i’m like yay** ** 😛 **

Daichi:  😳😳😳😳😳

Kageyama: **usually i like to fuck but tonight we gon make love cuz you bae** ** 🤭 **

Hinata: tonight????  😳 kags?!?!?!

Oikawa: **nobody know, i fuck wit him on the low**

Iwaizumi: i’m pretty sure EVERYONE knows

Iwaizumi: clingy ass

Oikawa: you love it.

Iwaizumi: i do 🙄

Kenma: **we never show up together but i text him when i’m ready to go**

Kageyama: **i had a couple of shots at the bar**

Akaashi: **i’m finna play wit that dick in the car** ** 🤭 **

Bokuto: i-  😳 . absolutely no words 

Kenma: **i got him swerving and breaking the law** ** 💓 **

Kuroo: AYO 🔇 DAS 🔇 NOT 🔇 SAFE 🔇

Akaashi: **these windows tinted so nobody saw** ** 😁 **

Sugawara: **aint nobody freak like me** ** 🌚 **

Daichi: i know

Kageyama: **give ya what you need like me**

Hinata: nobody can replace you 🥺💓

Kageyama: good

Oikawa: **ain’t nobody got up on they tip, tip toes and rode to the tip like me** ** 🥳 **

Iwaizumi: what’s up with you today 🤔

Oikawa: want you 

iwaizumi: oh yeah

Oikawa: yeah 🥺

Kuroo: go sext somewhere else

Bokuto: ^

Akaashi: uh anyway....

Akaashi: **i got em addicted he fiendin**

Sugawara: **my body a drug and he need it**

Kenma: **he begging me for the treatment**

Kuroo: kitten tell me when i’ve ever had to beg

Kenma: stfu  😁

Bokuto: kenma loves kuroo exposed part 900

Kageyama: **he throw a fit when i leave him**

Hinata: what.....

Oikawa: **he like “baby let me rub, let me rub on ya”**

Kenma: **“can i get a lil love, lil love from ya”**

Sugawara: **my body addictive, it’s drivin him crazy think i gotta run from him**

Daichi: your body is perfect

Sugawara:  🥺🥺 baby 

Hinata: that’s so sweettttt 🥺

Kageyama: **don’t know what to do without it**

Akaashi: **he fuckin with you? i doubt it**

Bokuto: who’s fucking with who i’m confused 

Kuroo: idk bro

Kenma: **they don’t understand that i’m all in his head and it’s nothing to do with my body**

Bokuto:  🥺👉🏽👈🏽

Oikawa: **you been fiendin for me lately goin brazy brazy**

Iwaizumi: i’ve missed you lately yeah....not just sexually 

Oikawa: iwa-chan 🥺🥺🥺

Kageyama: **i got what you need i’m gon give it to you baby**

Hinata: and you better not hold back 😌

Kageyama: i-

Hinata: yeah i said it.

Sugawara: **goin brazy brazy, fiendin for me lately**

Daichi: mhm

Sugawara: **i got what you need ima give you what you craving**

Akaashi: **see i’m a big ole freak**

Kenma: **i love to talk my shit, and you must be a pussy boy if you get offended**

Kuroo: well i’m still here so obviously not

Bokuto: ^

Oikawa: **bitch it’s tina snow, they love me cuz i’m cold**

Sugawara: **and you can’t take no — from me i got mind control**

Daichi: i’m never ever leaving you anyway

Kenma: **i wanna fuck in the mirror, i like to look at your face when you in it**

Kuroo: if you wanted that you could’ve said so 😳

Kenma: i’m saying so now....

Kuroo: bet

Akaashi: **come in the room and i’m giving commands i am the captain and he the lieutenant**

Kageyama: **i need that neck like a mf pendant**

Hinata: anything 💓

Kageyama: **need you to spit make that mf glisten**

Hinata: always 🌚

Kuroo: always-

Hinata: mind your business 🥱

Oikawa: **tell him shutup make that mf listen, i bet he gon like it he won’t do no trippin**

Iwaizumi: shit i mean... 😳

Bokuto: ooooo someone likes when oikawa takes controlllll 😳

Kageyama: **ain’t nobody freak like me**

Sugawara: **give ya what you need like me** 💓

Kenma: **ain’t nobody got up on they tip, tip toes and rode to the tip like me**

Bokuto: ride me

Kenma: say less  😌

Akaashi: **i got him addicted he fiendin**

Sugawara: **my body a drug and he need it** ** 💓 **

Kageyama: **he begging me for the treatment**

Hinata: you make me beg 😾

Kageyama: shh you love being teased 😾

Kuroo: i could have gone my WHOLE LIFE without hearing that 

Kenma: **he throw a fit when i leave him**

Akaashi: **“and baby lemme rub, lemme rub on ya, can i get a lil love a lil love from ya”**

Bokuto: but you like it 

Sugawara: **my body addictive it’s driving him crazy i think i gotta run from him**

Daichi: wait didn’t you say that before 

Sugawara:  🤭

Oikawa: **don’t know what to do without it**

Iwaizumi: let me come over

Oikawa: roommates ☹️

Iwaizumi: just keep your voice down then 😁

Kageyama: **he fuckin with you? i doubt it**

Hinata: i don’t want anyone else 

Kageyama: you don’t 

Hinata: no 🥺

Kageyama: good boy ❤️

Kuroo: I told you....

Bokuto: that this was not good 🤭

Hinata: it was therapeutic for me, i don’t regret it 😌💅🏽

Sugawara: **they don’t understand that i’m all in his head and it’s nothing to do wit my body** ** ❤️ **

Daichi: i think about you all the time baby 🥺❤️

Akaashi: **you been fiendin for me lately, goin brazy brazy**

Kenma: **i got what you need i’m gon give it to you baby** 💓

Bokuto: really 

Kenma: yeah

Akaashi: me too bb 

Kuroo: guess we’re all gonna be together tonight

Oikawa: **going brazy brazy, fiending for me lately**

Iwaizumi: oikawa please 😣

Oikawa: come over.

Oikawa: but if my roommates hear us again i’m gonna hurt you  🙄 .

Iwaizumi: got it 

_ iwaizumi is offline  _

Hinata: again...?

Oikawa: things happen 

_ oikawa is offline  _

Kageyama: **i got what you need ima give you what you craving** 🌚

Hinata: god yes

Kageyama: come over

Hinata: otw 😌💅🏽

_ hinata and kageyama are offline  _

Sugawara: .....we all know how this ends 😁

Daichi: yeah lmao 

Kuroo:  👀

Bokuto: d i p 

_ everyone is offline _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it physically and mentally pained me to write the word “skeet” for this 😭😭😭
> 
> such a nasty word. makes me cringe😭


	11. Lightning fast

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Akaashi: guys we’re playing a game cuz i’m bored 

Sugawara: so we don’t have a choice

Akaashi: not at all

Kageyama: okay then 

Kenma: bossy

Akaashi: you like it 

Kageyama: gross?

Oikawa: ooo yay! what game

Akaashi: lightning fast 

Sugawara: ?? 

Akaashi: i say a word and y’all just say whatever comes to your mind first 

Kageyama: oh okay i see

Kenma: are we just gonna take turns or is it like general 

Oikawa: it’ll probably be easier if we take turns 

Akaashi: yeah anyway let’s start

Akaashi: who wants to go first

Sugawara: me 😌

Akaashi: new 

Sugawara: times new roman

Kenma: english teachers would be proud

Akaashi: kageyama, breakfast

Kageyama: hinata 

Oikawa: what 😨

Kageyama: what-

Sugawara: i’m sitting on a bad boy piece of information  😳

Akaashi: choosing to ignore that comment

Kenma: ^

Akaashi: Kenma, great 

Kenma: depression 

Oikawa: what are you? a history teacher?

Kenma: i just have great depression ❤️

Kageyama: do- 

Kageyama: do you wanna talk

Sugawara: yeah are you okay

Kenma: i’m fine 

Akaashi: text me bb 

Kenma: got it

Akaashi: Oikawa, hotel

Oikawa: good sex

Oikawa: actually that depends....it could be terrible sex 

Kageyama: is that all you think about  😃

Oikawa: no 😾

Akaashi: anyway 🙂

Akaashi: remember y’all’s order because i’m about to just start saying words 

Kenma: okay 

Sugawara: got it

Akaashi: clean 

Sugawara: sakusa 

Kenma: LMFAO

Oikawa: jeff don’t laugh 😭😭

Akaashi:  😭😭😭

Sugawara: STOP 😭

Akaashi: room 

Kageyama: in my room 

Akaashi: the song by frank ocean? 💀

Kageyama: yes 😭

Kenma: i like that song

Sugawara: ^ 

Oikawa: no sleeper seats that’s a mattress 😛

Akaashi: okay okay next 😭

Akaashi: cartoon 

Kenma: cartoon network 

Kageyama: reasonable conclusion

Sugawara: i use to love cartoon network  🥺

Kenma: come over to cuddle and watch old cartoons bae ❤️

Akaashi: let me join

Oikawa: me too 🥺

Kenma: ofc bb 😌

Kenma: kageyama?

Kageyama: i’m good 

Kenma: omg stfu bitch you’re cuddling with us

Oikawa: yeah 😾

Kageyama: no ❤️

Sugawara: yes ❤️

Akaashi: can we talk about this another time

Oikawa: someone is impatient  😳

Oikawa: kenma is he always like that 🌚

Kenma: gonna pretend u never asked me that question....

Akaashi: anyway back to the game

Akaashi: bell 

Oikawa: blue bell icecream

Kageyama: ....now i want icecream

Sugawara: when we ALL cuddle and watch cartoons you can get some icecream 😁

Kenma: we should do it tonight

Akaashi: i’m down 

Oikawa: same i miss you guys 🥺

Kageyama: once again, no ❤️

Kenma: why not

Oikawa: we’re too hot and he wouldn’t be able to hold back 😌

Akaashi: ..... 😃 huh

Sugawara: omg stop being so difficult and just cuddle with us 

Kageyama: why should i 

Sugawara: we’ll let you be in the middle of us all 🙄

Kageyama: i’m in

Oikawa: attention whörë 😁

Kenma: that’s funny coming from you but anyway

Oikawa:  😾

Akaashi: we doin this tonight?

Sugawara: yes 

Oikawa: who’s place?

Kenma: mine

Kageyama: get the icecream 

Sugawara: starting to think you wanna see the ice cream more than you wanna see us 💔

Akaashi: sounds about right 

Kageyama: shouldn’t everyone be getting ready

Kenma: yeah hurry tf up hoes 🗣‼️

Oikawa: okay okay

_everyone is offline_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> did you guys grow up calling this game something else? 
> 
> Not kags refusing to cuddle until it was clear he’d be the center of attention😹


	12. Keiji

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Sugawara: hi guys 🧍🏽

Akaashi: hey 

Oikawa: hiii

Kageyama:  👋🏽

Akaashi: kenma says hi 

Sugawara: why doesn’t he just text it...

Akaashi: currently laying on kuroo and playing games

Kageyama: oh 

Oikawa: i don’t believe you 

Akaashi: *1 picture attachment* 

Akaashi: fuck the flash was on

Sugawara:  😨😨😨😨

Akaashi: and no ones gonna help me???

Kageyama: and no ones gonna help her 😨

Oikawa: wowwww some world we live in  🙄

_ kenma is online _

Kenma: Keiji come out the fucking bathroom 😁

Sugawara: oop- girl not- 

Oikawa: oop it’s  _ Keiji  _ now 😳

Akaashi: you’re gonna hurt me

Kenma: i won’t baby i promise 😁

Kageyama: please stay in the bathroom

Akaashi: that’s a fat lie 

Kenma: i’m gonna get Kuroo to unscrew the handle if you don’t come out yourself

_ Oikawa added Kuroo  _

Kuroo: lmao what’s goin on in here 😳

Kenma: come upstairs.

Akaashi: i sent that picture i took of y’all here 

Kuroo: kenma are you trying to hurt akaashi 

Kenma: no just come here i need your help

Oikawa: he’s lying your honor 🙄 . he is tryna hurt akaashi 

Kageyama: why don’t you hurt kuroo

Kuroo: now why am i in it??? 😾

Kenma: he didn’t do anything wrong...this time 

Kuroo: now see how i get thrown into stuff...i ain’t even did nun 🙄

_ kenma and akaashi are offline _

Sugawara: KUROO PLEASE GO HELP AKAASHI

Kuroo: why are you assuming he’s the one in danger

Oikawa: kenma is literally gonna kill him

Kuroo: trust me he’s got it under control 

Kageyama: he’s going to DIE

Kuroo: he’s fine 

Sugawara: how can you be so sure

Kuroo: just wait

_ akaashi and kenma are online  _

Akaashi: i wanna apologize to all of you for what i did, it was very wrong and i am very sorry.

Kuroo: see 

Akaashi: i would like to move on a lead a normal life. you know, get a job and a wife and change my ways.

Kuroo: not done yet 

Akaashi: and i hope this apology impresses you even though kenma made me do it and i don’t really mean it 

Kenma: you mean you do mean it.

Akaashi: i mean i do mean it. 

Sugawara: i don’t think he means it

Kageyama: sooo how is akaashi not dead

Oikawa: seriously you called him Keiji 😳

Kenma: these are my words, i did write this, and this is from my heart

Kuroo: i told y’all he was gonna be fine 🙄🙄

Akaashi: yup totally fine 

Kageyama: but how 😐

Kenma: it’s a secret

Akaashi: told him i’ll buy him games

Kenma: ruined the secret 😐

Sugawara: that’s it?

Oikawa: it’s that easy? 

Kuroo: only if you’re akaashi

Kageyama: and you? 

Kuroo: despite what y’all may think he doesn’t get mad at me often

Akaashi: very true

Kenma: ......

Kuroo: as you can see in that picture akaashi sent y’all.....he loves being curled up against me 😏

Kenma: shutup

Oikawa: kuroo really said “before i was gonna keep it to myself, but actually....i’m a little bothered now cuz why is it that the gurls-“

Sugawara: part 1000 of kenma being exposed for being a kuroo lover 😹✋🏽

Kenma: ofc i love him.

Kuroo: she, me, her, she does 😛

Kageyama: is that true 😨😨

Akaashi: it’s very true 💅🏽

Kenma: whatever 

_ kenma is offline  _

Sugawara: aw you guys made him leave 

Oikawa: what’s he doing now

Akaashi: he’s curled up against kuroo again

Kuroo: yup 😛

Kageyama: take another picture. you won’t. 

Kuroo: uhm rip to you guys

_ kuroo left the group _

Sugawara: why’d he say rip to us 😳

_ kenma is online _

Kenma: i can still see the pop ups for y’all’s messages you know that right 

Kageyama: shit 

Kenma: everyone offline now. 

Oikawa: but-

Kenma: now. 

_ everyone is offline _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That whole “apology” is from the boondocks for anyone confused...if you wanna see it just look up “smokin with cigarettes part 4” on youtube and it should come up. 
> 
> anyway kenma loves kuroo. period💅🏽  
> i had to get this chapter off my chest.


	13. Whipped

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Oikawa: hey guys 

Sugawara: hey  🤼‍♂️

_ Oikawa added Iwaizumi, Hinata, Bokuto, Kuroo, and Daichi _

Sugawara: why’d you add them 

Hinata: hi guys  😁

Kenma:  🤨🤨🤨

Akaashi: what’s happening 

Oikawa: i was bored 

Iwaizumi: hey 

Bokuto: HEY

Kuroo: wassup guys

Daichi: why were we added 

Oikawa: i just said i was bored 

Daichi: yeah and what does that have to do with us 💀

Oikawa: suga get him 

Sugawara: why 😭😭

Sugawara: it was funny  😭

Kuroo: what are y’all planning to do today 🤔

Oikawa: nothing i was literally just bored

Oikawa: is everyone here??

Bokuto: why do you need all of us 😨

Oikawa: omg i just want to talk to y’all why is everyone acting like i’m planning to hurt y’all 🙄

Kenma: shoyo wheres kageyama 

Daichi: oh that’s who’s missing 

Hinata: he’s napping 

Akaashi: oh ok

Hinata: he looks adorable when he’s not frowning all the time

Iwaizumi: hey oikawa

Oikawa: yes iwa-chan 😁

Iwaizumi: make me admin

Oikawa:  🤔

Oikawa: okay i guess

_ oikawa made iwaizumi admin  _

_ iwaizumi added ushijima  _

Oikawa: why. 

Ushijima: Hello Oikawa. 

Oikawa: no

Iwaizumi: you said you were bored right 

Bokuto: you did say that

Akaashi: bokuto-san i don’t think that means he wants to be tortured 

Bokuto: he’s being tortured  😨😨😨

Kenma: no....

Kuroo: not literally 

Daichi: god

Oikawa: Iwaizumi i’m going to kill you 

Ushijima: I do not think that is legal.

_ oikawa removed ushijima  _

Iwaizumi: it was a joke calm down 

Oikawa: it wasn’t funny

Hinata:  😬😬😬😬

_ kageyama is online _

Kageyama: hey guys what’s happening 

Oikawa:  😐 .

Sugawara: uh oh

Iwaizumi: oikawa 🙄

Oikawa: iwaizumi 🙂

Iwaizumi: i’m sorry baby

Bokuto:  😳

Kuroo: hold tf up 

Kenma: hold tf up bitch 🙄

Oikawa: you don’t mean it 

Iwaizumi: i do.

Sugawara:  🙂

Daichi: calm down suga

Sugawara: alright so y’all just seen that corny ass shit-

Iwaizumi: Oikawa text me

Iwaizumi: please 

Oikawa: i trusted you and made you admin but you added him 😾

Kageyama: this is a lot of shit goin on and i just woke up 😭

Hinata: this is a lot in general 😭

Iwaizumi: i’m sorry 😾

Oikawa: you’re a bitch

Iwaizumi: okay 

Oikawa: asshole 

Iwaizumi: right 

Oikawa:  😐

Iwaizumi: you done now?

Oikawa: yes.

Sugawara: period tell him 🙄

Hinata: why don’t you like ushijima 

Kageyama: don’t ask 

Hinata: oh sorry never mind that 

Bokuto: should we change the subject

Kuroo: ^

Kenma: just be quiet until the problem resolves itself 

Akaashi: ^

Iwaizumi: okay i’m sorry

Oikawa: for

Iwaizumi: taking the joke too far

Oikawa: and 

Iwaizumi: and i promise i won’t do it again

Oikawa: AND

Iwaizumi: and rip my fucking wallet dude 😐

Oikawa: good boy 😁

Iwaizumi: shutup 🙄

Oikawa: thin ice.

Iwaizumi: sorry baby 😾

Daichi: he’s whipped 

Kuroo: i ain’t never ever....seen you act like dis before 😳

Akaashi: problem solved let’s move on 

Kenma: no, no, no..........slightly submissive iwaizumi  🤨

Hinata: kinda hot 😹

Kageyama:  😐 ?

Sugawara: it’s adorable 

Iwaizumi:  😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐

Oikawa:  😁

Bokuto: whipped 

Kuroo: whipped 

Daichi: whipped 

Sugawara: stop y’all 

Iwaizumi: i hate y’all so much

Oikawa: he doesn’t 

Iwaizumi: he does 😐 .

Hinata: he’s embarrassed 

Kageyama: i just sit back and observe

Akaashi: moving on from whatever tf that was

Kenma: bokuto 

Bokuto: yeah?

Kenma: hoodie 

Bokuto: okayyyy 🥺

Daichi: what

Kuroo: he wants his hoodie 

Daichi: ohhh 

Iwaizumi: and he’s just gonna give it to him?

Akaashi: yes 

Kuroo: didn’t you just get called good-

Iwaizumi: fuck you

Kuroo: not my type 

Kenma: cut it out 😐

Kuroo: okay

Daichi: whipped 💀

Sugawara: definitely whipped

Kageyama: whipped x100 

Akaashi: i think we can all agree we’re all whipped for atleast one person 

Kageyama: not me 

Hinata:  🤔

Kageyama: i lied

_ kageyama and hinata are offline  _

Oikawa: anyway i’m still bored 🙄

Daichi: what are we supposed to do about that

_Oikawa removed Daichi, Hinata, Bokuto, Kuroo, and Iwaizumi_

Akaashi: LMFAO WHY

Oikawa: they were fucking boring 🙄

Sugawara: well what do we do now 

Kenma: go to bed maybe

_ kenma is offline _

Oikawa: it’s 3pm-

Akaashi: he doesn’t care

Sugawara: yeah he sleeps when he wants 

Oikawa: true......

Oikawa: i’m gonna ask iwa-chan to get me food bye guys 

Akaashi: yeah bye i’m hungry too 

Sugawara: bye guys 💓

_ everyone is offline _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> who would’ve thought ushijima would make an appearance.... suga was ready to fight iwaizumi😳
> 
> moral of the story is nobody trusts oikawa when he’s bored and they’re all absolutely whipped for eachother


	14. Rip kags

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Oikawa: hey....heyyyyy.... 👨🏽🦲

Sugawara: how y’all doin.... 👨🏽🦲

Kenma: hey 

Kageyama: sup 

Akaashi: “sup” 

Kageyama: yeah and? 

Oikawa: what are you? straight? 🗿

Sugawara: stopppp 😭😭

Sugawara: he literally BREATHED lmfaooo 😭

Kenma: lmfaooo 

Kenma: Sup guys 🥶let’s get dis bread 🥖💸 💯

Kageyama:  😐

Akaashi: Never 🙅♂️simp🤢over no hoe 👰 🦍

Kageyama: i fuckin hate this town 

Oikawa: LMFAOOOO

Kageyama:  😐😐😐

Oikawa: look guys he’s so mad 😹

Sugawara: so mad right now 😹

Kenma: look at himmm 😹😹😹😹

Kageyama: SHUT THE FUCK UP 

Akaashi:  😳

Kenma: oop-

Oikawa: LMFAOOODHDKDJSNS

Sugawara: LMFAO PLSSSS

Akaashi: he’s had enough LMFAOOOOO

Oikawa: babe it’s not that serious 😹😹✋🏽

Kageyama: oh my god

Kenma: guys i think he’s stressed

Kageyama: i ain’t shit 

Oikawa: definitely stressed 

Sugawara: do you need a hug sweetheart 🥺

Kageyama: i don’t need shit 

Akaashi: well that’s not nice 😐

Kenma: who the fuck turns down a hug from Suga 😐

Oikawa: and you cussed at him for nothing 😐

Sugawara: ....

Oikawa: say sorry  😐

Kageyama: why?????

Sugawara: it’s ok guys lmao...

Kenma: kags you know we were joking with you earlier right hun 

Akaashi: ^

Oikawa: i don’t think it was necessary to get mad at suga

Kageyama: ....

Kageyama: sorry suga

Sugawara: it’s fine babe 👍🏽

Kageyama: ....can i have a hug fr

Sugawara: i promise i’ll give you the biggest hug next time i see you 💓

Oikawa: so he WAS stressed

Kageyama: SHUTUP

Kenma: he really went from  🥺 to  😠 in a matter of seconds 

Akaashi: lmfao wow 

Kageyama: y’all are my biggest headache 😃

Kageyama: nah

Kageyama: hinata first then y’all 

Kenma:  😁🔪

Akaashi:  ✨ hide ✨

Sugawara: yeah i’d hide if i were you 😬

Oikawa: well shit 

Kageyama: wait no that was a joke 

Kenma: hmm? 

Kageyama: IT WAS A JOKE I SWEAR

Kenma: better be 😐

Kageyama: yeah cuz you’d be first 🗿

Akaashi: he’s bold 

Sugawara: i guess he’s never getting that hug 

Oikawa:  😬😬😬 oh fuck...

Kenma: open your door.

Kageyama: wha- I PROMISE IT WAS JUST A JOKE I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE FUNNY-

Kenma: open the door 😐

Kageyama: promise you won’t hurt me

_ kenma is offline _

Akaashi: oh he’s DEFINITELY gonna hurt you

Oikawa: good luck babe 😁

Sugawara: really wish i could’ve given you one last hug 🙁 .....oh well!

_ akaashi, oikawa, and sugawara are offline _

Kageyama: WAIT GUYS HELP ME 

Kageyama: PLS HELPSHDF HYYSJS%#\£+<>|!\¥}\ge

_ kageyama is offline _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys i know i normally update everyday but i’ve been slacking 
> 
> take this as a peace offering🙇🏽♀️🙇🏽♀️
> 
> never insult hinata in kenmas presence🗿


	15. “i’m hungry”

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Oikawa: guysssss i’m so hungry  😭

Kenma: ok? 

Kageyama: that’s not our problem 

Oikawa: oh you’re still alive  🗿

Akaashi: ouch 💀

Sugawara: you set yourself up for that one

Kageyama:  🙄

Oikawa: speaking of being hungry though....i think we should all text our boyfriends that we’re hungry 😁

Akaashi: why 😭

Sugawara: i’m not hungry though...i actually just ate

Oikawa: omg just to get their reaction 

Kenma: why does their reaction matter 

Kageyama: ^

Oikawa: it will be fun just do it 

Oikawa: you have absolutely nothing to lose and you may even get a free meal 😁

Kageyama: ok well if we don’t then you’re buying us food 

Oikawa: no ❤️

Sugawara: then no ❤️

Oikawa: do i look like i’m made of money  😠

Akaashi: if we don’t get a free meal you have to buy us the meal...simple 

Oikawa: don’t you guys have money

Kenma: it’s not free if we buy it 🥱🥱

Oikawa: omg fine

** Kagehina **

Kageyama: i’m hungry 

Hinata: eat then stupid 🤗

Kageyama:  😐

Hinata: or do you want me to make you food again 

Kageyama: god no that was a disaster 😭

Hinata: you told me you liked it  😠😠

Kageyama: i- 

_ kageyama is offline _

Hinata: HEY!  😠

** Iwaoi **

Oikawa:  🥺👉🏽👈🏽

Iwaizumi:  🗿

Oikawa: i’m hungry 🥺

Iwaizumi: go  ✨ eat ✨

Oikawa: buy me something to eat and i will 😁

Iwaizumi: ... 🗿

Iwaizumi: what do u want

Oikawa: pizza 

Oikawa: i want u to come over and watch movies too 😾

Iwaizumi: we’re cuddling. 

Oikawa: whatever you wanna do 😁

** Bokuakakuroken **

Kenma: guys 

Akaashi: we’re hungry

Kuroo: okay.......

Bokuto: i’m hungry too  🤯

Kenma: kuroo 😾

Akaashi:  😁😁

Bokuto:  👀👀

Kuroo: why me 🗿

Akaashi: get us fooooood  🕺🏽

Kuroo: no ❤️

Bokuto: yes ❤️

Kenma: make us something then 🙄

Kuroo: did everyone lose their hands n feet or something

Bokuto: NOOO.....that would be very bad if we did 

Akaashi: he didn’t mean it literally

Kuroo: y’all can get up and go make yourselves food

Kenma:  😾

Akaashi:  😾

Bokuto:  😾

Kuroo: this is bullying 

Kenma: food 😾

Kuroo: fine 🙄

Akaashi: thx bb 🥺🥺

Bokuto: YES

Kuroo: y’all are lucky i love y’all  🗿🗿

Kenma: less talking more cooking 

** Daisuga **

Sugawara: baby 🥺

Daichi: yesss

Sugawara: i’m hungry 🥺

Daichi: you didn’t eat yet??

Sugawara: .....no 🌚

Daichi: i’m coming over with food

Sugawara: i- don’t bring me too much please 😭

Daichi: but you just said you didn’t eat

Sugawara: it was just some challenge oikawa wanted us to do 

Sugawara: i ate baby i promise 🥺

Daichi: i’m still coming over because i miss you 

Sugawara: okayyy 🥺😭

**Pretty setters** 💅🏽

Oikawa: how’d it goooo 👀

Akaashi: kuroo is currently cooking for us 😁

Kenma: ^

Sugawara: daichi is coming over 😭😭

Kageyama: hinata is probably gonna attack me next time he see’s me....

Kenma: as he should 😁

Akaashi: why 😳

Kageyama: i called the last time he cooked a “disaster”

Kageyama: could you blame me tho???

Kenma: yes 

Oikawa: yes 

Kageyama: THERE WAS SHELLS IN THE EGGS-

Sugawara: atleast he tried?  😭😭😭 idk 

Akaashi: oikawa how’d it go for you though 

Oikawa: *1 picture attachment*

Oikawa: he loves me 😁

Sugawara: sweet but i have to straighten up before daichi gets here

Kageyama: i think he’d prefer if you stayed gay

Kenma: LMFAO

Kenma: i mean  🗿🗿🗿

Sugawara: you’re so funny  🌚

_ sugawara is offline _

Akaashi: it was kinda funny 💀

Oikawa:  😭😭😭

Kageyama: ok so everyone is getting food except me..... 😐

Kenma: yeah....tragic isn’t it 

_ kenma is offline _

Kageyama: oikawa 🌚

Oikawa: i only agreed because i thought you’d all succeed  🙄

Kageyama: well  😐

Oikawa: just call chibi-chan and tell him come over and bring food

Akaashi: yeah do that 

Kageyama: bruh he’s gonna hurt me

Akaashi: who’s fault is that 

Oikawa: exactly

Oikawa: you shouldn’t have insulted his cooking LMAO

Akaashi: yup ^

Oikawa: anyway bye 

Akaashi: have fun with that

_ oikawa and akaashi are offline  _

Kageyama: HEY

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i noticed this work now has 101 kudos.......which means there’s 101 of you who need to come to therapy with me❤️
> 
> no but seriously thank you guys 😭
> 
> Kageyama when hinata cooked: mmm....i know a lot of things but i don’t know about THAT🌚
> 
> Hinata when kageyama refused to continue eating because he almost choked on an egg shell: i can’t stand you ungrateful bitches....you ungrateful bitches need jesus, and let me tell you why-


	16. “i kissed my best friend”

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Oikawa: guyssss 😁

Kageyama: what is it this time 😐

Kenma: you only text when you’re about to start shit 

Oikawa: you guys have no faith in me 😞

Sugawara: but is he wrong

Akaashi: that’s because it’s true

Oikawa: ....i just want to do this prank 😞

Kenma: bye

_ kenma is offline  _

Kageyama: damn he actually dipped 💀💀

Sugawara: what’s the prank 🗿

Akaashi: gonna be  ✨ bullshit ✨

_ kenma is online  _

Kenma:  😐😐😐

Oikawa: text your boyfriends “i kissed my best friend” 

Kageyama: ...uh okay i guess 

Sugawara: what’s the point of this 

Oikawa: entertainment 

Kenma: that’s not gonna work for us

Akaashi: yeah we can’t both just tell them we kissed our best friend 

Kenma: who just happens to kiss their best friend at the same time

Akaashi: yup it’s hella sus

Oikawa: okay well kenma you say it then 

Akaashi: and what about me 

Sugawara: act surprised LMFAO 

Kageyama: yeah be like “you did what?? 😨 ”

Kenma: y’all are fucking stupid 😭

Oikawa: shoo shoo go do it 😭

** Kagehina  **

Kageyama: hinata

Hinata: what do you want liar 😾

Kageyama: can we drop that already i said i’m sorry

Hinata: you still lied to me 

Kageyama: and you tried to kill me with eggshells 

Hinata: i did not!  😠

Kageyama: oh yeah then why did i CHOKE ON EGGSHELLS 

Hinata: if i was gonna choke you id do it with my bare hands STUPID 😾

Kageyama: try me bitch 👹

Hinata: i hate you 😠

Kageyama: yeah okay

Hinata: ......what did you want to tell me though 

Kageyama: nothing, love you bye  ❤️

_ kageyama is offline _

Hinata: what? i- KAGEYAMA  😭

Hinata: idiottt 😞

** iwaoi **

Oikawa: iwa-chan 😞

Iwaizumi: what’s up 

Oikawa: i have bad news...

Iwaizumi: uhm okay

Oikawa: i kissed my best friend...

Oikawa: i’m sorry 😞

Iwaizumi: yeah ok? we kiss all the time

Oikawa: yeah we do more than just kiss 😳

Oikawa: i mean- IWA-CHAN 😭

Iwaizumi:  🤔

Oikawa: what if i really kissed someone else

Iwaizumi: you wouldn’t 

Oikawa: i wouldn’t?

Iwaizumi: nah

Oikawa: what if i kissed suga  🌚

Iwaizumi: have you? 

Oikawa: ....maybe

Iwaizumi: i’m not that surprised actually 

Oikawa: what???

** Bokuakakuroken **

Kenma: guys i kissed my best friend 

Akaashi: omg you what 😨

Kuroo: huh??

Bokuto: who?

Kenma: shoyo 

Kuroo: chibi-chan???

Akaashi: hinata??? 😨

Bokuto: WHAT

Kenma: yep....we kissed 👍🏽

Bokuto: ...was it nice? 

Kuroo:  😐

Bokuto: what?? i wanna know 😭

Akaashi: why’d you kiss him 😞

Kenma: it just happened  🕺🏽

Kuroo: .....

Bokuto: u don’t love us anymore :( 

Kenma: ofc i love you guys it was a prank okay 🗿

Kuroo: hmm

Bokuto: ....oh

Akaashi: yeah it was a prank 

Bokuto: AKAASHI YOU WERE IN ON IT TOO 😨

Kuroo: there’s an imposter among us 💔

Kenma: ew

Kuroo: wow you don’t like that or my science jokes either????

** Daisuga **

Sugawara: Daichi 🧑🏽🦯

Daichi: Suga

Sugawara: i kissed my best friend 🌚

Daichi: oikawa? again? 

Sugawara: omg-

Daichi: damn

Sugawara: THAT WAS ONCE DURING A GAME

Daichi: still happened 

Sugawara: everyone promised not to talk about it 

Daichi: you’re the one who brought up kissing him 💆🏽

Sugawara: i said BEST FRIEND not oikawa

Daichi: well who else could that be?

Sugawara: i don’t know????

Daichi: is he a good kisser

Sugawara: what does that have to do with anything 

Daichi: well you kissed him again soooo

Sugawara: omg it was just a prank 😭😭

Daichi: the question still stands 

Sugawara: DAICHI!  😭

Daichi: okay okay 😭

** Pretty Setters 💅🏽 **

Oikawa: how’d it go for you guys 👀

Sugawara: my boyfriend is a perv 😭😭😭

Akaashi: wym lmfaoo 

Sugawara: y’all remember when me and oikawa kissed that one time.... well daichi wanted to know if oikawa is a good kisser

Oikawa: 10/10, was very hot, i’d do it again

Sugawara: stoppppp 😭😭

Kageyama: i wasn’t in the room so good for me i guess 🗿

Kenma: yeah we remember....10/10, very nice show, would wanna watch again

Sugawara: you guys are the worst 😭😭

Oikawa: how’d it go for the rest of you 👀

Kageyama: i couldn’t do it

Oikawa: pussy 🙄

Kageyama: whatever

_ kageyama is offline  _

Kenma: it was stupid 

Akaashi: kuroo made an among us joke

Kenma: it was terrible

Akaashi: it was kinda funny 😭

Kenma: and this is why you don’t deserve an opinion ❤️

Oikawa: well iwa-chan knows about the kiss now suga  🌚

Sugawara: HE WHAT

Oikawa: he wasn’t even surprised 🙄

Akaashi: y’all flirt with eachother all the time i don’t think anybody is surprised atp luv 💀

Sugawara: he knows it was just because a game right  😃

Oikawa: uhm sure

_ oikawa is offline  _

Sugawara: i’m gonna kick his ass 😭

Kenma: what ass 🗿

Akaashi: LMFAOOO

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kagehina arguing per usual 😭


	17. Happy Halloween!

** Happy Halloween from the Pretty Setters, to you😁 **

Oikawa: HAPPY HALLOWEEN

Akaashi: from the pretty setters 👍🏽

Sugawara: be sure to stay safe tonight  😁

Kageyama: enjoy yourself without putting your health at risk

Kenma: and if you happen to die? oh well what can we do about it 

Sugawara: KENMA 

Kenma: what i meant was, don’t get sick.

Oikawa: and definitely DONT die 

Akaashi: i wouldn’t advise partying

Sugawara: but if you do, follow health guidelines.

Kageyama: wear your mask 👍🏽

Kenma: don’t gather in large groups...or you’ll probably get sick and die 🌚

Sugawara: stop trying to scare them 😐

Kenma: it’s literally halloween 🙄🙄🙄

Oikawa: anyway, keep your distance from people— remember, 6 feet 😁

Akaashi: maybe just stay home and watch scary movies  🕺🏽

Kageyama: yeah!

Sugawara: we care about you, so be safe.

Kenma: that’s debatable  🗿

Sugawara: HE CARES TOO!

Oikawa: if you’re trusting your neighbors and you’re still going trick or treating

Sugawara: then wear your mask! 

_ sakusa joined the group  _

Sakusa: sanitize. heavily. 

_ sakusa left the group _

Kageyama: how does he do that????

Oikawa: stay focused 😭

Kageyama: right

Kenma: check your candy

Akaashi: and once again, be safe.

Sugawara: because we love you 😁

Oikawa: and we wouldn’t want to lose you!

Kenma: have a nice, fun, and safe night.

Kageyama: enjoy yourself!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy halloween guys!
> 
> Be safe, have fun, enjoy yourself 😁
> 
> and if you don’t plan on celebrating or you can’t, then i hope you have a wonderful night aswell.💓


	18. What did oikawa do this time?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW// mention of marijuana/edibles

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Oikawa: suga

Sugawara: yes 

Oikawa: don’t be mad

Kenma: god what did u do now

Sugawara: .... 😃

Oikawa: well yk those brownies u told me to “hold on to” 

Kageyama: what brownies 

Akaashi: oh shit

Sugawara: OIKAWA

Oikawa: IM SORRY 

Sugawara: how many did u eat

Oikawa: two

Kenma: oh you’re finna be off ur ass 😹

Akaashi: TWO

Sugawara: WHY WOULD YOU EAT TWO

Kageyama: i’m lost 

Oikawa: well i was thinkin...we’re best friends so u wouldn’t mind if i had one 😳 ........but then

Sugawara: but then 😃😃😃😃😃

Oikawa: but then it was really good so i ate another one

Kenma: god 😭

Akaashi: bro go lay down please

Kageyama: so is nobody gonna explain to me what’s going on 🙄

Sugawara: he ate my edibles  😃

Kageyama: ohhhhhhhh

Kageyama: oh shit

Oikawa: bro 💆🏽

Oikawa: i hear a song 

Kenma: just go to sleep 

Sugawara: .............

Akaashi: i think suga is still processing  😭

Sugawara: I TOLD YOU HOLD ONTO THEM NOT EAT THEM 

Oikawa: well you didn’t tell me i couldn’t eat them 

Sugawara: omfg 

Kageyama: yikes 

Oikawa: i honestly feel like my room is smaller like the walls literally look like they’re closing in

Sugawara: shower and go to bed 

Kenma: he’s gonna lose track of time if he gets in the shower now 😭

Sugawara: it’ll calm him down a little

Akaashi: and what if he just stays there 

Sugawara: he’s not a child 

Kageyama: are you sure about that 😳

Oikawa: i’m okay i’m just gonna lay down

Sugawara: get up and go get in the shower 

Sugawara: now 

Sugawara: set a timer so u don’t forget to get out 

Oikawa: okay fine 😞

Kenma: chile... 😐

Kageyama: shouldn’t someone tell iwaizumi 

Sugawara: it’s not that serious 

Kageyama: i meant so he can laugh too but😳

Oikawa: i’m okay

Akaashi: yeah let’s see how long that lasts

_ 10 minutes later _

Oikawa: so i’ve been sitting here for 10 minutes and i can’t remember how the fuck i turn on the shower

Kenma: LMFAOO

Kageyama: that’s not funny he’s really struggling 😭😭

Sugawara: did you turn the knob....

Oikawa: YES but it won’t turn...turning on the shower shouldn’t be this hard 🙄

Akaashi: did u pull then turn it lmfao

Oikawa: ....

Oikawa: it’s on 

Kageyama: how come it’s always you getting into some shit 🙄

Sugawara: BECAUSE HE DOESN’T LISTEN

Oikawa: you could’ve told me they were edibles

Kenma: you seriously mean you couldn’t smell it 😭

Akaashi: fr 💀

Oikawa: omg i just wanted a brownie 😭😭

Sugawara: get off your phone and get in the shower before i have to come make you get in 

Oikawa: if u wanna suck a lil dick jus say dat ya lil horny freaky fuck 😏🥴

_ oikawa is offline  _

Kenma: LMFAO DJDJEKIS PLEASE OMFG 

Kageyama: i’m screenshotting all of this 💀

Akaashi: stopppp 😭😭😭

Sugawara: why is he like this...

Kenma: AND THE WAY HE JUST LEFT TOO

Akaashi: lmfaoooo 😭

_ 30 minutes later  _

Sugawara: uhm someone call him  🗿

Kageyama: you call him 

Sugawara: if i call him ima cuss him out for eating my shit 🙄 .

Kenma: why do we need to call him 

Akaashi: because it’s been 30 minutes and he’s realllll quiet  👀

Sugawara: akaashi call him please 

Akaashi: okay 

_ 5 minutes later _

Akaashi: fucking dumbass 💀

Sugawara: jesus fucking christ what did he do now 

_ oikawa is online  _

Oikawa: LMAO hi guys 😭

Kenma: what’d u do 👀👀

Oikawa: i set a timer for 20 hours not 20 minutes 😭😭😭

Kageyama: and you were just gonna sit there for 20 hours????

Sugawara: seriously you didn’t think for a second “hmm i’ve been in here kinda long maybe i should check the time”

Oikawa: well the timer hadn’t gone off so i just stayed  🤷🏽♀️

Kenma: are u dumb 

Oikawa: well the timer didn’t go off so what do u want me to do?????

Sugawara: go lay down now that’s what i want you to do 

Oikawa: but i’m hungry 

Sugawara: i’m finna slap the shit outta him. 😁

Kenma: do it 

Kageyama: DO IT 👀

Akaashi: stop encouraging him  👨🏽🦲

Akaashi: oikawa if you value your life PLEASE just go to sleep  🗿

Oikawa: ima need you to shut dat shit up chief ✋🏽

Oikawa: boutta raid the fridge 😏

Sugawara: i’m never leaving anything with you again 💀

Oikawa: does that mean i can eat the rest? 

Sugawara: yeah go ahead if you wanna die 

Akaashi: just so it’s clear that means don’t eat them 

Oikawa: damn it 

Kenma: eat them i wanna see what happens 

Sugawara: he dies. 

Kageyama: good. eat them 👀

Akaashi: stop before he actually eats them and starts hearing colors 🙄 .

Oikawa: if i eat them i can hear colors????

_ oikawa is offline  _

Akaashi: bitch- NO!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so yesterday was lil peeps birthday....peep stans how we feelin?
> 
> Anyway did you guys have a good halloween? I just watched movies and ate candy....i hope you all stayed safe😁


	19. chaos?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW// mention of marijuana/edibles

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Sugawara: we’ve all gathered here today to talk about oikawa 😁

Oikawa: aww we’re talking about me today 🥴

Akaashi: yes we all need to talk about wtf is wrong with you 

Kageyama: what goes on in your mind 

Kenma: i personally don’t give a fuck what goes on in your mind...it’s entertaining 

Oikawa: well i think about food a lot 

Sugawara: no no.....why do you always get yourself mixed up in some shit 

Oikawa: ohhh 

Oikawa: is this about the brownies again 🙄

Akaashi: it’s about your pattern of getting into drama then dragging us down with you 🙄🙄

Kenma: i find it entertaining.

Oikawa: omg if you’re mad about the brownies jus say that because if you wanted some i would’ve shared  🙄

Sugawara: THEY WEREN’T EVEN YOURS 

Kageyama: hey someone make me admin 

_ sugawara made kageyama admin  _

_ kageyama added iwaizumi  _

Oikawa: BITCH

Oikawa: WHY TF 

Iwaizumi:  🗿🗿🗿🗿 wtf happened now 

Sugawara: he ate ALL OF MY EDIBLES 

Sugawara: ALL OF THEM 

Oikawa: okay well when i asked if i could you said ok

Akaashi: i told you that meant DONT 

Sugawara: i also said if you want to die 

Oikawa: exactly so i ate them?????

Iwaizumi: oikawa wtf 😐😐😐

Oikawa: haha. laugh. funny. 🙄 take a joke 

Kenma: this shouldn’t be funny to me 💀

Kageyama: stop....jus watch 🗿

Oikawa: if you wanted one just say so 🙄

Iwaizumi: ofc i wanted one

Iwaizumi: WAIT WHY DID YOU EAT THEM ALL

Oikawa: because they were fucking good 😭

Oikawa: like if i’m not supposed to eat them all then DONT MAKE IT SO GOOD

Sugawara: you weren’t supposed to eat ANY

Iwaizumi: wait so this is why you called me at 3am asking me to bring you something to eat

Iwaizumi: suga idk why you trusted him with your food 🗿

Sugawara: so now it’s my fault your boyfriend is stupid 🗿

Oikawa: i’m not stupid  😾

Iwaizumi: he’s not stupid

Kageyama:  🌚🌝

Kenma:  🌝🌚

Kageyama: i had to laugh 😭

Kageyama: *sent 5 picture attachments* 

Iwaizumi: i take that back...

Iwaizumi: YOU COULDN’T TURN THE SHOWER ON 😭

Oikawa: IN MY DEFENSE I WAS REALLY FUCKING HIGH 

Oikawa: LIKE SUPER FUCKING HIGH

Akaashi:  🗿 let’s not forget that 20 hour alarm 

Oikawa: stopppp this is embarrassing  😭😭

Iwaizumi: dumbass 💀

Iwaizumi: 20 hours  😭😭😭

Sugawara: he meant to put 20 minutes 

Sugawara: WHY’D YOU JUST STAY??? 

Oikawa: my perception of time was wayyyy fucked up 

Oikawa: i just decided to stay until it went off because after what felt like years i decided to check my phone and it was only 5 minutes dude 

Kageyama: ok but suga 🌚

Sugawara: what 

Kageyama: you....smoke? 

Sugawara: fuck no 💀

Sugawara: i hate the way it makes my throat feel....only edibles for me 😼

Kenma: i don’t like being high

Oikawa: i mean at first it was like wtf? because i wasn’t expecting it but then it was funny....like everything was funny 

Iwaizumi: that’s why you don’t touch stuff that isn’t yours stupid 

Oikawa: bitch didn’t you just say you wanted one 🗿

Iwaizumi: excuse me- 

Oikawa: YEAH i said it  🙄

Kenma: damn 💀

Kageyama: not “bitch”  😭😭😭

Sugawara: like what happened to “iwa-chan”  😭

Iwaizumi:  😃

Oikawa:  🙄

Iwaizumi:  😃

Oikawa: okay anyway

Oikawa: i mean 10/10 experience i guess

Iwaizumi: you couldn’t turn on your own shower and you still give that a 10/10 💀

Oikawa: that’s the EXACT reason i give it a 10/10

Oikawa: i was so fucked up 😭

Sugawara: ....you really ate all of my edibles 🗿

Iwaizumi: ....he really woke me up at 3am to use me 🙄

Oikawa: you’re the one who can’t say no to me 😉

Iwaizumi: fuck off 💀

Sugawara: AND YOU BOUGHT FOOD FOR HIM AFTER HE ATE MY EDIBLES 

Oikawa: WELL WAS I SUPPOSED TO STARVE 

Akaashi: you could’ve gone to sleep like we said

Kageyama: they did say that

Kenma: multiple times actually 

Iwaizumi: bruh it was 3am i didn’t know he was high i just thought he was hungry so i got him food 🙄

Oikawa: what he means is he’s madly in love with me so he’d get me food if i asked at any time 😁

Akaashi: would you?

Iwaizumi: ...yeah

Akaashi: oikawa give him to me 😐

Oikawa: he’s not for sale 😭

Kenma: akaashi i’m gonna hurt u 🙄

Kageyama: worldstar 💀

Akaashi: do it 

Akaashi: you won’t 😏

Sugawara: i feel like i’m hearing something i shouldn’t be hearing....

Kageyama: that was gross

Oikawa: aw i thought there was really gonna be a fight 😾

Kenma: akaashi i’m gonna seriously hurt u 😃

Akaashi: i’m gonna seriously like it bae 😁

Iwaizumi: .....what the fuck 🗿

Sugawara:  💀 you have a problem with reading that? 

Iwaizumi: yes?

Sugawara: did you forget we’ve all literally heard you and oikawa having sex 😃

Iwaizumi: i was trying to forget actually.....

Kageyama: i thought we were never gonna talk about that again 

Kenma: oikawa has pretty moans 😼

Oikawa: aww thanks babe 🥺🥺

Iwaizumi: ...

Akaashi:  😐

Kenma: don’t worry bb i still think your moans are prettier 😽

Akaashi: stopppp

Sugawara: omg kiss already 🙄

Oikawa: he wants a show 🙇🏽♀️

Kageyama: can we please have one normal conversation  😞

Iwaizumi: seriously 

Akaashi: a show? like the time you and suga kissed?  🤭

Sugawara: WHY DOES THAT KEEP GETTING BROUGHT UP 

Kenma: cuz it was hot 🌚

Oikawa: you wouldn’t kiss me again babe?  🥺

Iwaizumi: stop

Oikawa: you should’ve seen it iwa-chan 😁

Kageyama: i guess my “normal conversation” request is just getting ignored again today 

_ kageyama is offline  _

Sugawara: it was just a kiss...because a game.

Kenma: there was also a lot of touching

Akaashi: yeah like a lottt

Iwaizumi: .....

Oikawa: he’s thinking about it 😹

Iwaizumi: i’m not...

_iwaizumi left the group_

Oikawa: oh he’s DEFINITELY thinking about it

Sugawara: or he’s mad 

Oikawa: trust me he’s not 😼 ....i’m sitting on a bad boy piece of information 💅🏽

_ oikawa is offline  _

Kenma: oh shit

Akaashi: does that mean what i think it means 

Sugawara: WHY DOES HE ALWAYS JUST LEAVE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i don’t know why kageyama still hopes for a normal conversation 🗿


	20. I ain’t never seen.....

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Oikawa: i’m about to lose my mind 

Kenma: why 

Akaashi: ^ 

Oikawa: literally all day my mind has been like “hoes on me, left and right” 

Sugawara: glock .9 put em out like a light 😏

Oikawa: NO

Kageyama: same asf i cant escape “i ain’t never seen two pretty best friends”

Kageyama: i’ve really never seen two pretty best friends tho 😳

Oikawa: me and suga 🙂

Kageyama: ....like i said, i ain’t never seen two pretty best friends......

Oikawa: BITCH 

Sugawara: i- 

Kageyama: suga isn’t the ugly one btw

Kenma: imagine 💀💀💀

Akaashi: lmfaoooo

Oikawa: you’re a bitch 

Oikawa: a stupid bitch actually 

Sugawara: let me just mind my business  😁

Kageyama: sorry...ur jus not as pretty as suga 🗿

Oikawa:  😐😐😐😐

Kageyama: god it’s a joke 💀

Kenma: beat his ass  😹

Akaashi: stop instigating 🗿

Oikawa: do you think i’m pretty tobio 🙂

Kageyama: .....yes  🗿

Sugawara: does that mean im the ugly one 🤭

Kageyama: NO 

Kenma: he’s digging a deeper hole for himself 💀

Akaashi: lmao a deeper hole 

Kenma: grow up ❤️

Oikawa: so if we’re both pretty...

Sugawara: i guess we aren’t best friends after all  😳

Oikawa: right....

Sugawara: mhm kiss me 

Kageyama: why we goin so fuckin fast-

Kenma: kisssssss kisssssss

Akaashi: do it already

Sugawara: you guys are terrible....it’s just a joke 

Oikawa: so you don’t wanna kiss me 💔

Sugawara: i do 😳

Kageyama: this is my fault....

Kageyama: we were finally having a normal conversation for once and now we’ve ended up here 💔

Oikawa: kiss me already 

Oikawa: pussy  😳✋🏽

Sugawara:  😐 ....

Sugawara: i’m gonna kiss u  🙄

Oikawa: KISS ME THENNN

Sugawara: IM GONNA FUCKING KISS U

Kenma: jesus if you’re gonna do it then do it 

Akaashi: yeah we don’t have all day 

Kageyama: oh dear that’s not good....i feel the need to say the f word now

Oikawa:  😭😭

Sugawara: anyway 

Sugawara: i’m bored 

Kenma: so y’all really just not gon kiss.... 🙄

Akaashi: yeah wtf happened 

Oikawa: omg we told y’all it’s a joke 😭

Sugawara: exactly

Kageyama: let’s talk about...idk.....ANYTHING ELSE

Oikawa: i’d still kiss you though 

Sugawara: i’d kiss you back bae 💕

Kenma: y’all are fucking annoying 💀

Akaashi: so y’all would kiss....but you won’t 😃

Sugawara: exactly bc it’s a joke but like if we HAD to kiss i’d have no problem with kissing him 

Oikawa: that doesn’t mean we’re just gonna kiss though 😭

Kenma: i don’t buy it. 

Kageyama: the sexual tension between you two is fucking disgusting bye. 

_kageyama is offline_

Akaashi: i don’t buy it either...y’all’s last kiss was very intense 😁

Sugawara: we’re not talking about that again today ❤️

Akaashi: okay fine 

Oikawa: what are y’all doing

Kenma: games 

Oikawa: AWWW YOU STOPPED PLAYING TO TEXT US BACK 

Kenma: only because there was drama 

Kenma: bye now 

_kenma is offline_

Sugawara: oh wow 😃

Akaashi: don’t know why y’all expected any different from him 💀

Oikawa: IM SO BORED 

_ kageyama is online  _

Kageyama: finally a normal conversation 😌

Oikawa: boy stfu 

Kageyama: you stfu

Oikawa: are you gonna make me 🙄

_kenma is online_

Kenma: twink.

Akaashi: LMFAOOOO

Sugawara: wha- i- THAT WENT FROM 0 TO 100 SO FAST 

Oikawa: omg i didn’t mean it like that

Kageyama:  😃😃 ......what........

Oikawa: I DIDNT MEAN IT LIKE THAT

Kageyama: i mean if you say so

Sugawara: wowww bae i thought what we had was special 💔

Kenma: god ur such a bottom 💀

Oikawa: and you’re not  😹

Kenma: this ain’t about me 😛

Akaashi: i know you didn’t just tell him- 

Oikawa: I DIDNT MEAN IT LIKE THAT

Kageyama: ima jus..... 

_ kageyama is offline  _

Sugawara: LMFAO OMG HE LEFT 😭😭

Oikawa: dramatic 🗿

Kenma: you’re talking???

Oikawa: WHY ARE YOU COMING FOR MY NECK TODAY-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kags’ last bit of sanity is fraying 😭
> 
> will oikawa and suga ever kiss to get everyone to stfu? 🧐....hmmmmm


	21. 3 things you’d take

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Oikawa: hey bitches 😏

Kenma:  🧐

Akaashi:  🤨🤨

Sugawara:  🤔🤔🤔

Kageyama: why are they doing that 

Sugawara: cuz we’re tryna figure out who tf he’s talking to 😹

Oikawa:  🙄

Oikawa: hi guys 😁

Kenma: hey 

Akaashi: that’s better 😁

Oikawa:  🙄 anyway. 

Sugawara: what do u need 

Oikawa: i wanna play a game 

Kageyama: no 

Kageyama: no i’m about to lose my shit 

Kenma:  👁👄👁

Akaashi:  👁👄👁 u good bruh? 

Kageyama: no i’m not good

Sugawara: i- what’s wrong-

Oikawa:  🗿

Kageyama: nothing...what’s the game 😞

Kenma: what was wrong tho 

Kageyama: nothing...i’ve now accepted the fact we will never have a normal conversation 😃

Akaashi: ohhhh 

Sugawara: babe you should’ve accepted that a long time ago.... 

Akaashi: like a LONG time ago 

Oikawa: like when this group chat was created 🗿

Kenma: didn’t you add him after you added us 🤔

Akaashi: yup you added iwaizumi before him 

Oikawa: shutup ❤️

Oikawa: anyway i want to play this game 

Kageyama: that kinda hurted me tho.....

Sugawara: what bullshit do we have to do this time 😁

Oikawa: go ask your boyfriends 3 things they’d take if y’all broke up

Sugawara: hmm ok... 🤨

Kenma: k 

Akaashi: ^ 

Kageyama: alr 

** kagehina  **

Kageyama: boke 

Kageyama: if we broke up what 3 things would you take

Hinata: ...are we breaking up? 

Kageyama: no it’s just a question

Hinata: oh good 😅

Hinata: let me go put this knife away lol...

Kageyama: what 👁👄👁

Hinata: nothing ❤️

Kageyama: what 3 things would you take though

Hinata: uhmmm.....the first hoodie you gave me.... idk what else

Kageyama: that was years ago why do you still have it- 

Hinata: because...

Kageyama: DIDNT YOU TELL ME YOU LOST IT

Hinata: oops guess we’re both liars 😁

_ hinata is offline  _

Kageyama: bruh 👁👄👁

** iwaoi **

Oikawa:  🤭

Iwaizumi:  🤔

Oikawa: iwa-chan 😁

Iwaizumi: yes 🧐

Oikawa: i have a question 

Iwaizumi: ask away 

Oikawa: if we broke up what’s 3 things you’d take 

Iwaizumi: we’re not breaking up so i don’t gotta worry about that 🗿

Oikawa: but what if we did

Iwaizumi: uh 

Oikawa: mhm take your time

Iwaizumi: idk baby

Oikawa: thinkkkk

Iwaizumi: can’t think. mind blank.

Oikawa: iwa-chan 😭

Iwaizumi: mmm mind full of you actually  😳

Oikawa: stoppp 😭😭😭

Iwaizumi: call me

Oikawa:  👀 okay

** bokuakakuroken  **

Kenma: we got a question 

Akaashi: a serious one 👀

Bokuto: i feel like that was directed at me but i’m going to ignore it ❤️

Kuroo: what’s the question 🤔

Kenma: if we broke up what 3 things would y’all take 

Kuroo: this again 

Akaashi: yup me n kenma are breaking up with you guys and getting married 😹

Bokuto: but then you wouldn’t have us...

Kenma:  😐 ....that’s the point- 

Akaashi: be patient with him pls

Bokuto: you guys aren’t really getting married right  😰

Kuroo: if you do i guess that means me and Bo are just gonna have to marry eachother 💔

Kuroo: gonna miss you guys or something i guess 🙄

Kenma: we won’t miss you ❤️

Bokuto: ouch 😭

Akaashi: lmfaooo omg 😭

Kenma: answer the question seriously tho

Kuroo: mmm id take my “unnecessary amount of pots”  🙄

Kenma: good you have entirely too many. 

Kuroo: you don’t complain when i cook for you 😾

Kenma: akaashi can cook for me 😌

Akaashi: i could try

Bokuto: oh.....

Bokuto: uhm i would take 

Bokuto: uhm 

Akaashi: take your time and think bb :)

Bokuto: can i take anything 

Kenma: yeah sure 

Bokuto: idk 

Kuroo: then why’d you ask if you can take anything 

Bokuto: idk i thought it would help 

Bokuto: it didn’t help in case you guys were wondering 

Akaashi: we can tell.... 

Kenma: okay well kuroo choose 2 more things 

Kuroo: idk what else to choose 😭

Kenma: think then 🙄

Bokuto: yeah think 🙄

Kuroo: me???

Kuroo: wait a damn minute 💀

Akaashi: don’t say it 

Bokuto: what’s he gonna say

Kenma: something that’s gonna have him sleeping alone for a week 🗿

Kuroo: wowww 

Akaashi: bokuto protection squad  😼

Kuroo: i feel like i’m just being bullied atp

** daisuga  **

Sugawara:  😘

Sugawara: ❤️

Sugawara:  ❤️

Sugawara: ❤️

Daichi:  ❤️

Daichi: ❤️

Daichi: ✊🏽

Sugawara: hiiiii 😁

Daichi: hey  ☺️

Sugawara: i got a question for u luv 🤭

Daichi: ...uhhh i gotta go  😁

Sugawara: Daichi. 

Daichi: okay what’s the question 😬

Sugawara: if we broke up....what 3 things would you take

Daichi: if we broke up? 

Sugawara: yup

Daichi: this is just hypothetical right 🤨

Sugawara: yes ofc now answer 

Daichi: uhhh

Daichi: how am i supposed to answer this if i’ve never thought about us breaking up 😭

Sugawara: think about it now 

Daichi: i’d take you and put u in my basement  😜

Sugawara: WHAT 

Daichi: i’m kidding 😭😭😭

Sugawara: i’m never breaking up with u 😭

Daichi: what if you get tired of me  🤭

Sugawara: then i’ll make you wanna leave me 😹

Daichi: not happening....you’re an angel in my eyes 😉

Sugawara: Lucifer was an angel once. the most beautiful one at that

Daichi: well- 😳😳

Sugawara: MHMMM 🤭

** Pretty Setters 💅🏽 **

Sugawara: guys my boyfriend is crazy 😜

Kageyama: daichi?? 

Sugawara: apparently if i break up with him the basement is mine  😻

Kenma:  😳😳 i’m...terrified *covers face* 

Akaashi: chile 😭😭😭

Kageyama: didn’t expect that from him 

Sugawara: he’s joking......i hope 

Sugawara: anyway what about y’all 

Kenma: kuroo almost had to sleep alone 

Kageyama: why 😭

Akaashi: he was about to say sumn about bokuto 🙄✋🏽

Sugawara: hey wheres oikawa??

Kageyama: don’t summon him 😐

Kenma: what is he? a demon? 

Akaashi: LMFAOOOAODJJAKFKSKJS

Kenma: babe it was not THAT funny 😜

Sugawara: mkay... 💀

Akaashi: hey what did hinata say he’d take

Kageyama: he said some hoodie i gave him years ago then he just left 

_ oikawa is online _

Oikawa: hi guys 😁

Sugawara: where were u 🤨

Oikawa: in the shower 😹

Kenma: .....not even gonna ask 

Oikawa: good because you weren’t gonna like the answer 😜✋🏽

Kageyama: i am.....disgusted

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> is this implying oikawa and iwaizumi had phone sex and oikawa had to go shower because of it😳..................................yes.😜
> 
> also i like to think that akaashi and kenma often joke about leaving bokuto and kuroo to marry eachother. (they wouldn’t though ofc🗿)


	22. they did it, they really did it....

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Oikawa: *video attachment*

Sugawara: are you pervs happy ✋🏽

Akaashi: i just choked on my water 😃

Kenma: i hope that continued after the camera turned off 😜

Oikawa: ...

Sugawara: it didn’t  👀

Kageyama: it’s too early for this 

Akaashi: it’s 12pm 

Kageyama: i said what i said 🙄

Kenma: i think y’all are lying but okay...keep your secrets 🙄

Oikawa: there’s no secret 😜

Sugawara: did y’all enjoy the video though...

Kenma: 10/10, saved it to my phone, converting it into a live wallpaper. 

Sugawara: you’re not having a live wallpaper of us kissing

Akaashi: nothing you say is gonna stop him

Kageyama: i could’ve probably enjoyed it if it were someone besides oikawa 😩🙏🏽

Oikawa: i’m gonna hurt u one day

Kageyama: do it 🙄

Oikawa: shutup didn’t u want to kiss me 🙄

Kageyama: only to prove you’d kiss me 🗿

Akaashi: but wouldn’t that turn out bad for y’all if y’all would both kiss each other..? 

Kenma: yeah i mean if you’d both willingly kiss each other just to prove a point...that’s susss 😭

Sugawara: oikawas face is as red as a tomato right now 😭

Oikawa: SUGA!

Kageyama: fuck you guys 

_ kageyama left the groupchat  _

_ sugawara added kageyama  _

Akaashi: he’s maddd 😹🙏🏽

Kageyama:  🙄

Kenma: anyway let’s talk about oikawa and suga kissing  😜✋🏽

Sugawara: why’d you have to bring it back up 🕴🏽

Akaashi: do daichi and iwaizumi know 🤔

Oikawa: who do you think helped us record 😭

Kageyama: wait a damn minute- 

Kenma: you know what i found? 

Akaashi: something that explains everything 😳

Sugawara: stop jumping to conclusions 🙄

Oikawa: exactly 

Sugawara: y’all wanted to see us kiss, they wanted to see us kiss...everyone got to see so we can all stfu now 😁

Kageyama: finally let’s talk about something else  😩🙏🏽

Kenma:  🗿 shutup bitch 

Kageyama: why am i being bullied 

Kenma: bc you make it too easy 🙄 ...bitch 

Kageyama: okay shorty 🗿

Akaashi:  👀 ....uh oh 

Kenma: i’ll beat ur ass again  😹

Oikawa: DO IT 

Oikawa: don’t forget to record 

Sugawara: yeah record it 

Akaashi: worldstar 😭😭😭

Kageyama: bruh????

Sugawara:  🌚🌚 i said what i said...

Kageyama: wowwww 🙄

Oikawa:  😹 okay drama queen 

Kenma: ...you’re talking??

Oikawa: omg this wasn’t about me 

Akaashi: you set yourself up for that one...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for clarification....no suga/oikawa/iwaizumi/daichi isn’t a thing, they just wanted to see their boyfriends kiss and that is okay😜
> 
> also i like to think that iwaizumi and daichi have become friends because suga and oikawa are together often.


	23. one morning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clarification for last chapter: 
> 
> why does everyone want OiSuga to kiss?
> 
> It’s a running joke between the “pretty setters” to bother Suga.
> 
> Daichi just thought it would be hot to see Suga with someone else...if he wanted it to go further than just a kiss? The world will never know.
> 
> Iwaizumi has a secret....and it’s the fact that he likes Suga (gasp)....but not in a way that he’d want to pursue him (romantically).
> 
> Is Oikawa offended by that fact?
> 
> No. Why? Because he knows Iwaizumi only truly loves him, and he himself wouldn’t mind getting ~physical~ with Suga. (double gasp but y’all should’ve saw that one).
> 
> Does Suga realize this?
> 
> My baby is oblivious...pray for him
> 
> Why did he agree to kiss Oikawa (again) then?
> 
> For Daichi’s enjoyment...should i put (implied) (and honestly only slight) voyeurism in the tags? 
> 
> Are these 4 in a relationship? 
> 
> Nope. 
> 
> Have they engaged in sexual activities together?
> 
> If you consider a really ~heated~ kiss to be a sexual activity then i suppose you could say that. (though it was only between oikawa and suga)
> 
> Who recorded? 
> 
> It was Oikawas idea to record it so Iwaizumi was forced into that job. 
> 
> Is Iwaizumi ever going to act on this “infatuation”?
> 
> Nope. IwaOi is permanent. Although they are a bit open in their relationship, they only love eachother, he will get over this soon enough and Oikawa understands that. DaiSuga is also permanent.
> 
> no that’s not implying the other ships aren’t ^
> 
> or is it?
> 
> Im kidding i cant handle angst my heart is weak.
> 
> Also this chapter is sweet...(besides kags bullying kenma) but this was a lot of typing soooo get to reading now.
> 
> if you have more questions i can attempt to answer but i’m stupid so don’t expect much from me.

Pretty setters💅🏽

Oikawa: nice cock 

Sugawara: nicE CoCK

Kenma: NIcE COcK

Kageyama: at 8am? seriously 

Oikawa: yes at 8am now say it

Kageyama: nice cock 🙄

Sugawara: where’s the ENERGY

Akaashi: fr you gotta be like “NIce cOCk”

Kageyama: nICe coCK

Kenma: aww good boy 😹

Kageyama: shutup bottom 

Sugawara: i- 

Oikawa:  👁👄👁

Kenma: this is why ur boyfriend loves me more than u 🙄✋🏽

Akaashi: finally somebody got her 😹😹😹

Kageyama: oh really 

Kenma: yup 🙄 .

Kageyama: he does not 

Kenma: he does

Sugawara:  👀👀👀

Oikawa: just gonna watch this unfold  😹

Kageyama: wanna know how i know he doesn’t 

Kenma: he actually does but why 🤨

Kageyama: because you’re a stinky bottom 😹😹😹✋🏽✋🏽

Akaashi: god 😭

Kenma: i’m gonna hit him 

Kageyama: LMFAOOOO 

Sugawara: stop before he actually does it 💀

Kageyama: what’s a bottom gonna do to me? 😹🙏🏽

Kenma: count your days.  😐

Akaashi: oh shit 😭😭😭

Oikawa: and you’re not gonna stop him?? 😭

Akaashi: what can i do?  🤷🏽♀️😭

Kageyama: did you just tell hinata to hit me????

Kenma: yeah and i’m gonna hit you myself next time i see you

Sugawara: wHaTS a BOtTom gONnA dO To mE? *gets hit by hinata two seconds later*

Oikawa: how hard did he hit you 👀

Kageyama: pretty fucking hard

Kageyama: i knew he was acting really weird 🙄

Akaashi: what do you mean

Kageyama: idk like he cupped my face n kissed me n i was like okay he’s actin a little weird 

Kageyama: but then he pulled away n smiled then he slapped me

Kenma: as he should. 

Sugawara: is he not sweet everyday? 

Kageyama: i mean he is but something about it just felt weird 🤨

Oikawa: omg look he thinks he’s an expert on his boyfriends mannerisms  😹✋🏽

Kageyama: i am 🕴🏽

Akaashi: wait a damn minute 

Akaashi: why’s he at your house at 8am?

Kageyama: uhm well

Kageyama: he’s moving in....

Kenma: WHAT

Sugawara: OH MY GOD 🥺

Oikawa: AND THEY WERE ROOMMATES 

Akaashi: no, no....AND THEY WERE LOVERS

Kageyama: it’s too early for this 

_ kageyama is offline _

Oikawa: HEY 

Sugawara: THIS CONVERSATION ISN’T OVER

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it’s 12 am and i find myself to be hilarious 
> 
> also my friends “bully” me for being a bottom....IM NOT EVEN A BOTTOM😭😭...i’m always being attacked🙄✋🏽


	24. wowowow

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Oikawa: i hate men 🙄

Sugawara: hey girl 😳

Oikawa: awoooga 😳❤️

Kenma: shutup 🙄

Kageyama: ^fr 

Akaashi: hey don’t you have something to talk to us about 

Sugawara: YOUR NEW ROOMMATE  😳

Kageyama: no ❤️✋🏽

Oikawa: yes 

Oikawa: since when was THAT happening 

Kenma: shoyo still loves me more...i stand by that and i will die on this hill. 

Kageyama: y’all are nosey

Sugawara: well hurry up and tell us so we can poke our noses somewhere else 🙄

Oikawa: it’s the only logical solution  🙄

Akaashi: we don’t have all day either

Kageyama: we talked about it and he moved in

Kageyama: we done now 🙄

Kenma: yeah anyway 😐

Kageyama: shutup 

Kenma: shutup bitch  😜

Sugawara: not a very cash money explanation but i guess it will do....

Oikawa: you need to learn how to exaggerate things AT LEAST 🙄

Akaashi: fr that explanation was so dry 💀

Kageyama: yeah okay 

Kenma: pussy talented 

Oikawa: pussy got good grades ✨

Akaashi: pussy been around the block 🎥

Sugawara: pussy got aids 🤭

Sugawara: OOP

Oikawa: OOP

Kageyama: i-  👨🏽🦲

Kenma: i hope you readers know what twitter thread we’re referencing or this is reallll awkward

Akaashi: ayo  🔇 don’t 🔇 break  🔇 4th  🔇 wall 🔇

Kenma: i- right 😶

Kageyama: omg kick him out the group 🙄

Kenma: boy i will beat your ass try it 💀

Sugawara:  🎥🎥🎥

Oikawa: WORLDSTAR 

Akaashi: can i get a wow- 

Sugawara: wow

Akaashi: can i get another wow

Oikawa: wowww

Akaashi: get me another one

Kenma: .....wow

Akaashi: call the ambulance 

Sugawara: WOWOWOWOWOWOW

Kageyama: i fuckin hate this town 

_ kageyama is offline  _

Oikawa: i live for upsetting him ❤️

Kenma: i die for upsetting him ❤️

Sugawara: and i’ll sacrifice my whole life for upsetting him ❤️

Akaashi: y’all are terrible  😭

Kenma: you started it 

Akaashi: oh yeah....i did  💀💀

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not kenma breaking 4th wall🕴🏽
> 
> i hope you guys are now on thanksgiving break like i am...i’ve been waiting for this😭
> 
> remember to be safe this week (as well as any other week)


	25. never have i ever

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Sugawara: hoodie 👚 hoodie 👕

Akaashi: negan ⚡️ shim ✨ toga 💫

Kageyama: why 

Sugawara: don’t fuck up the chain 

Oikawa: ji ⭐️ boogie 💃🏻 boogie 💃🏻

Kageyama: .... iepon 💥 kogo 🔥 dance 👯♀️

Kenma: groovy 🕺 groovy 🕺

Oikawa: guys wanna like....

Kageyama: we don’t 

Oikawa: i didn’t even finish 

Sugawara: you don’t need to finish cause we don’t wanna do nun 🙏🏽

Akaashi: we’re all very uninterested in having this conversation  😜

Oikawa: one piece of advice....don’t read anything...if you don’t read it, it can’t harm you ☝🏽

Kenma: you got 30 seconds to say what you have to say or the answer is immediately no 

Oikawa: i want to play never have i ever, we all get 10 points and if we’ve done something we take away a point 

Sugawara: ...okay 

Akaashi: never have i ever been the most annoying person to walk the earth 

Oikawa: tobio-chan take away a point :( 

Kageyama: fuck you 

Kenma: not the fake sad face 💀

Akaashi: i was talking about you- 

Oikawa: lol...anyway guys can we be serious 🙄

Sugawara: never have i ever read my partners text messages 🌚

Kageyama: 10

Kenma: 10

Oikawa: 9

Akaashi: 10 

Sugawara: unexpected but 😳

Oikawa: omg not in that way...

Kageyama: what other way could it be 🌚

Oikawa: he’s gonna kill me for telling y’all this but 😹

Oikawa: when we’re together he always leaves his phone around and when he gets a message he tells me to read it for him so he can see if it’s worth the attention 

Akaashi: i can see that 

Kenma: cute.

Kageyama: anyway never have i ever lied to a police officer 

Sugawara: 9....i lie to daichi all the time 💀

Oikawa: 9....also im telling daichi 💀

Sugawara: snitches get stitches 

Kageyama: and don’t get bitches 

Oikawa: i’m literally gay 👨🏽🦲

Akaashi: trust me we know 

Akaashi: also 10

Kenma: the gods knew yo ass was gon be a snitch so they made you gay 🙄

Oikawa: boy stfu what’s your number 

Kenma: 9

Akaashi: what- 

Kenma: mind your business 

Sugawara: LMFAO never have i ever flashed someone 

Oikawa: do accidents count?

Sugawara: i guess so 😭

Oikawa: 8

Kenma: 8

Kageyama: 10....also kenma??  😳

Akaashi: don’t act surprised...10 still 

Sugawara: y’all are boring 

Akaashi: whatever... never have i ever had car sex 

Sugawara: 8 

Kenma: 7 oops

Kageyama: DAICHI DID WHAT WHERE 

Sugawara: who says it was with daichi 

Kageyama: oh please y’all are grossly in love 💀

Sugawara: ok fine it was with him but i’m not gonna explain anything else 😜

Oikawa: 7

Kageyama: 9...

Akaashi: guys in a car??? that’s not uncomfortable???? 

Sugawara: if you’re horny enough it doesn’t even matter 

Oikawa: true...never have i ever found a fictional character hot 

Kenma: take a point away readers 🌚

Akaashi: WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT BREAKING 4TH WALL

Kenma: couldn’t resist...it was literally free real estate 

Sugawara: 7...all i’m gonna say is watch Elite 

Oikawa: only if you watch with me

Sugawara: fine 

Akaashi: 9

Kageyama: 8

Kenma: never have i ever had to run for my life 

Kageyama: 7...kenmas fault 

Kenma: and i’ll do it again. 

Sugawara: 7 LMFAO

Akaashi: 8....also kenmas fault 

Oikawa: bye y’all are getting bullied by a midget 

Kenma: i’ll kill you 

Oikawa: if you want to make out with me just say so...you don’t have to threaten me 😹🙏🏽

Kageyama: what made you act this way 

Sugawara: who knows 

Akaashi: uh.....

Kenma:  🙂

Oikawa: gotta go fast— i guess this means 6-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suga says sometimes you have to lie to people so they can shutup and drop the subject😳🙏🏽


	26. i’m sick

Pretty Setters💅🏽

Oikawa: text your boyfriends “i’m sick” challenge  😳😳

Kenma: what happened to “hello” 

Akaashi: “how are you?”

Sugawara: “my name is....” 

Kageyama: what happened to that? 

Oikawa: whatever are y’all gonna do it or not

Sugawara: go ahead and log off for me baby...

Oikawa: PLEASEEEE

Kageyama: watch me disappear 

_kageyama is offline_

Akaashi: not him leaving fr-

Kenma: send me money and i might do it

Oikawa: aren’t you like...rich? 

Kenma: that’s not the point sweetheart  😐

Kenma: $20 

Oikawa: for you to send a text? is he serious 

Akaashi: he’s dead serious 

Kenma: taking time out of my day costs money

_ kageyama is online _

Kageyama: we’re getting paid for it? 

Sugawara: not us apparently 

Oikawa: nobody is getting paid! 

Kenma: fine...

** Kagehina  **

Kageyama: hey

Hinata: what’s up? 

Kageyama: ...i’m sick 

Hinata: WHY DIDNT YOU SAY ANYTHING BEFORE I LEFT

Kageyama: uh 

Kageyama: i didn’t wanna make you worry but i feel really bad now...

Hinata: and you kissed me 

Hinata: if you got me sick i swear 

Kageyama: that’s what you’re worried about???

Hinata: you’re an adult 

Kageyama: ...

Hinata: okay i’m coming home stop sulking 

Kageyama: wasn’t sulking 

Hinata: yeah yeah...what kind of soup do you want

** Iwaoi  **

Oikawa: iwa-chan :(

Iwaizumi: what’s wrong 

Oikawa: i’m sick :( 

Iwaizumi: i’m gonna kick ur ass 💀

Oikawa: WHY 

Iwaizumi: HOW’D YOU GET SICK 

Oikawa: you know what let’s ask the little bacteria floating around in my body  🙄

Iwaizumi: dramatic 

Oikawa: bring me tea 

Oikawa: and food 

Oikawa: and come cuddle and watch movies with me 

Iwaizumi: you’re gonna get me sick 

Oikawa: you’re gonna come anyway....

Iwaizumi: you’re the worst 

Oikawa: i love you too iwa-chan :)

** Bokuakakuroken  **

Kenma: guys me and akaashi got sick

Akaashi: yup

Kuroo: how’d you both get sick

Bokuto: are y’all okay 😧

Kenma: no...we’re sick

Akaashi: kenma was sick and he got me sick 🤷🏽♀️

Kenma: not you throwing me under the bus....

Kuroo: i can leave work if y’all want me to

Bokuto: i can make you guys tea!

Akaashi: please stay out of the kitchen 

Bokuto: :(

Kenma: you can’t leave work 

Kuroo: i can if y’all need me 

Akaashi: no it’s okay we’ll take care of ourselves 

Bokuto: i can take care of you guys

Kenma: i-  💀

Akaashi: it’s fine

Bokuto: y’all are bullies  😔

Kuroo: we’ll see you guys later okay

Bokuto: don’t die

Kenma: we’re not gonna die 

Bokuto: you could though 

Akaashi: ...no  💀

Kuroo: stop telling them they’re gonna die 

Akaashi: i’m pretty sure he’s the only one who’s convinced that we’re gonna die 

** Daisuga **

Sugawara: daichi 😗

Daichi: yes honey 😌

Sugawara: gross you make it sound like we’re an old married couple 😭😭

Daichi: we will be one day 

Sugawara: ew.... what are you in love with me or something

Daichi: never 🙄✋🏽

Daichi: what’d you need to tell me?

Sugawara: oh it was nothing  😅

Daichi: were you gonna tell me you’re “sick”  👀

Sugawara:  🤨 ...how’d you know 

Daichi: unlink our accounts baby i can see all your messages

Sugawara: WHY DIDNT YOU TELL ME SOONER 😭

Daichi: didn’t think it mattered...your conversations are very boring 💀

Sugawara: you’re the worst 😭

Daichi: you’re the one who set it up 😳

Sugawara: yeah and i forgot all about it

Daichi: see, not my fault 

Sugawara: my conversations are not boring

Daichi: you text the same few people everyday 😭

Sugawara: okay you can stop dragging me now 🙄

** Pretty Setters 💅🏽 **

Sugawara: not me forgetting me and daichi’s messages were linked 🥲

Oikawa: how’d you just forget- 

Sugawara: idk i did it one night when i was bored and forgot about it 😭

Kageyama: so uh...what do we do when they find out we’re not actually sick...

Oikawa: idk what YOU’RE gonna do but i’m actually sick 😹

Kenma: you’re a terrible person 💀

Akaashi: fake it

Sugawara: no don’t fake it 😭

Kageyama: well then what do i do- HES GETTING ME SOUP

Kenma: just eat it and take a nap

Akaashi: tell him you really only missed him 

Kageyama: he’s here everyday he’s not gonna buy that 😭

Oikawa: this sounds like a personal problem babe  😇

Sugawara: kags if i were you i’d beat his ass 😌

Oikawa: WOW i thought we were bestfriends 

Kageyama: fuck you he’s here-

_ kageyama is offline  _

Kenma: lmfao rip or somethin 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by the fact that i caught the flu from my sister 😔


End file.
